deepundergroundpoetry.com
Hours
He left me bereft
early hours
the light filtering through
his scent
lingered
hovering
like a shroud around fingers
to be uncovered on his triumphant return
on the edge of wanting
I would wait
remembering
with every breathing moment.
Published 19th Dec 2014
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19th Dec 2014 8:18am
19th Dec 2014 3:10pm
19th Dec 2014 5:20pm
This sounds like a life on hold, waiting for a hero's triumphant return. I'm not sure that remembering him "with every breathing moment" would be a state of peace. Someone's writhing on the bed, "on the edge of wanting," just counting the hours. Is this a pleasure or paralysis? You say "Hours" is "light and sweet" above, so I may be reading this with a jaundiced eye. Nevertheless I enjoyed. This one will keep me thinking as I wait for my heroine's return.
it's light and sweet as she remembers through thought how he made her feel awhile before
and how he will undoubtedly make her feel on his return
as she took herself to the edge but only to the edge
afterall, he wasn't there..
thankyou Crow on your very well written commenting
and how he will undoubtedly make her feel on his return
as she took herself to the edge but only to the edge
afterall, he wasn't there..
thankyou Crow on your very well written commenting
Anonymous
19th Dec 2014 5:32pm
Rose,
You have covered this so delicately, yet I can see the glow of the fuse. Hot write!
tornado
You have covered this so delicately, yet I can see the glow of the fuse. Hot write!
tornado
19th Dec 2014 6:25pm
yes fuse to be lit
best stand back MR T
It'll be colourful to say the least
best stand back MR T
It'll be colourful to say the least
Anonymous
19th Dec 2014 11:44pm
<< post removed >>
20th Dec 2014 7:37am
