Liquor and Bud, Sex and Shame

She had a crush on me
Going all the way back to High School
But I wasn't interested

She had long black hair
and a short, round face
But she was in shape…

Yes, round is a shape

I swore I'd never fuck her
She was gross
But I was bored
and a little lonely

Heard she had a job, and a car
So I found her on Facebook
Told her I wanted to "hang out"
She jumped at the opportunity

And so I used her for what I could
Liquor, bud, whatever I could think of

Knowing what she wanted
I made her work for it
I held out as long as I could

But after I fucked her, a strange thing happened
Apparently I had tripped, and fell into some feelings
Somehow, I had become attached

We drifted apart in the following month
The closer I tried to.get
The more she would push me away

By the time we broke up, I was pretty pathetic
I hated that I still loved her
And she could give a fuck less
She replaced me the next day

Months later, I still think about her
And I'm overcome with a mixture of guilt and shame
And I wonder to myself "was it worth it?"