deepundergroundpoetry.com

Voices

The screams in my head,
they torture me...
The cuts on my arms,
they make it go away...

Can't you see,
What this world has made of me?
Look what has happened!
I want to be gone...

Take my soul..
Rising demons..
Never let it go...
Take my life..

I'm Gone.

Written by lonelybride

(Alexa Jayde)

Published 20th Apr 2011 | Edited 25th Nov 2015

All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.

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Commenting Preference:

The author encourages honest critique.

mjs211 (MikeTheEngineer)

20th Apr 2011 2:25pm

I think the heart at the end substantially takes away from the serious nature of the subject matter at hand. I would suggest getting rid of it. In addition, I think ending a poem with an ellipse causes the last line to sort of slip away, rather than hit the reader. I'd suggest ending with a simple "I'm gone."