deepundergroundpoetry.com
Mother
Shoot me up so
I can sleep Mom,
I need bliss so
I can sleep Mom.
You are the only one
That can do the trick,
You are the only one
That can give me that fix.
I need you to tie me off so
I can slip into my dreams,
I need you to tie me off so
It can drip into my veins.
You are the only girl
I’d want to finish the job,
You are the only girl
I’d want to end my misery.
If she wasn’t you,
I’d only wish she was.
So, let me usher you in.
I’ll go first if you follow…
Just don’t let me go alone.
We wrote this tombstone together.
So, let’s fulfill this prophecy together.
I’ll be the one to fix your memories,
I’ll be the one to save you in eternity.
So, look no further, we’ll pass over to
The otherside one after the other.
I can sleep Mom,
I need bliss so
I can sleep Mom.
You are the only one
That can do the trick,
You are the only one
That can give me that fix.
I need you to tie me off so
I can slip into my dreams,
I need you to tie me off so
It can drip into my veins.
You are the only girl
I’d want to finish the job,
You are the only girl
I’d want to end my misery.
If she wasn’t you,
I’d only wish she was.
So, let me usher you in.
I’ll go first if you follow…
Just don’t let me go alone.
We wrote this tombstone together.
So, let’s fulfill this prophecy together.
I’ll be the one to fix your memories,
I’ll be the one to save you in eternity.
So, look no further, we’ll pass over to
The otherside one after the other.
Written by
Gonzo69
(AnthonyHendrix)
Published 24th Oct 2014
| Edited 31st Oct 2014
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 9
reading list entries 1
comments 27
reads 1353
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Re: Mother
26th Oct 2014 10:07am
re: Re: Mother
31st Oct 2014 9:52am
Thank you and thank you for your suggestions!
Your comments are always much appreciated!
Your comments are always much appreciated!
Re: Mother
29th Oct 2014 00:29am
This is morbid and sad, however I loved it. Good ink my friend. :) misses reading your poems. :)
1
re: Re: Mother
31st Oct 2014 9:54am
Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it :)
This one was weird even for me lol so I'm glad you liked it!
This one was weird even for me lol so I'm glad you liked it!
re: re: Re: Mother
3rd Nov 2014 3:35am
Re: Mother
30th Oct 2014 2:41pm
re: Re: Mother
I'm glad you get that it is conceptual!
It definitely is and I'm glad you could notice and appreciate that!
Happy to see your face again!
It definitely is and I'm glad you could notice and appreciate that!
Happy to see your face again!
Re: Mother
Anonymous
31st Oct 2014 1:50pm
Anthony, first of all good job on digging deep and coming up with this piece. It's definitely not a subject that flows down the mainstream as we cruise around reading other's work so for that its most definitely note worthy.
On my second and third reading, the repetitious lines were brilliant, not sure if that was pre-planned on your part or it was something that just flowed from your pen, but it has a very melancholy feel to it, like lulling back and forth in memories.
To the point that i felt it had lyrical rhythm from the technical side of it. I encourage you to experiment more with subjects that most shy away, that's what writing is about, grab your reader and shake them up a bit. Well done.
On my second and third reading, the repetitious lines were brilliant, not sure if that was pre-planned on your part or it was something that just flowed from your pen, but it has a very melancholy feel to it, like lulling back and forth in memories.
To the point that i felt it had lyrical rhythm from the technical side of it. I encourage you to experiment more with subjects that most shy away, that's what writing is about, grab your reader and shake them up a bit. Well done.
1
re: Re: Mother
31st Oct 2014 2:17pm
I'm proud to have a comment like this written about something I wrote. The lulling idea is great. I never thought about it that way but I'm stoked to know it had that effect. Oh, and by the way, this is my favorate comment so far. Thank you so much!
You're awesome.
You're awesome.
Re: Mother
5th Nov 2014 1:46pm
re: Re: Mother
5th Nov 2014 2:02pm
Anonymous
- Edited 14th Oct 2019 3:45am
10th Nov 2014 3:48am
<< post removed >>
re: ...
26th Nov 2014 10:26am
Re: Mother
Anonymous
1st Dec 2014 12:09pm
Fantastic ink sweetie. Great read!
1
re: Re: Mother
9th Jan 2015 7:52pm
Re: Mother
6th Dec 2014 2:24am
If she wasn’t you,
I’d only wish she was.
what every girl wants to feel at the exact moment you hand her your needle.
I’d only wish she was.
what every girl wants to feel at the exact moment you hand her your needle.
1
re: Re: Mother
9th Jan 2015 7:53pm
Re: Mother
8th Dec 2014 8:59am
re: Re: Mother
9th Jan 2015 7:54pm
Re. Mother
Anonymous
17th Feb 2016 6:33pm
Don't do it!
0
Re. Mother
12th Apr 2020 8:26am
God damn, now that made me feel a bit shaken... and I love it! Lol
It was dark but so deep at the same time.
I loved every line and was admiring the picture you were painting with your words.
It was dark but so deep at the same time.
I loved every line and was admiring the picture you were painting with your words.
1
Re: Re. Mother
12th Apr 2020 8:38am
Thank you so much. I thought you might like. That poem was dedicated to Scarlett A There is a whole bunch more in there to.
Re: Re. Mother
12th Apr 2020 8:39am
Re: Re. Mother
12th Apr 2020 8:40am
Re. Mother
Re: Re. Mother
It's about his death bro
Great catch
I knew his story and saw it as a tragic poem.
I'm very impressed.
You are the only reader to catch it
Great catch
I knew his story and saw it as a tragic poem.
I'm very impressed.
You are the only reader to catch it