deepundergroundpoetry.com
Night Swamp
I sense your warmth, close enough
to smell the past day on your clothes.
Grass and salt — the early dunes linger
on your skin, on blister cracked lips.
I see your hair is a tangle of lies you tell yourself
and the map is crumpled with frustration.
There's only further in, to the swamplands.
Red bumped bites... itching, oozing... " You mustn't scratch."
"This? Briny water, help yourself, here's a cup to dip."
I'm called by the dusk, by stirrings and flutterings.
My axe blunted, night hacking. Don't look back.
The paths are swallowed whole by the soul eater.
There's only further in, to the swamplands...
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likes 10
reading list entries 3
comments 20
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Re: Night Swamp
Anonymous
21st Aug 2014 8:58pm
<< post removed >>
re: Re: Night Swamp
23rd Aug 2014 6:52am
Re: Night Swamp
22nd Aug 2014 00:32am
re: Re: Night Swamp
23rd Aug 2014 6:53am
Re: Night Swamp
22nd Aug 2014 1:04am
Well, Atakti, luv :-* ~
You never cease to amaze and awe. Never would I have envisioned a swamp journey as transformative and positive, yet I have the pervasive feeling here that this journey is just that. At the end, the swampland are a desirable(?) goal. See? I am still skeptical, yet that is the atmosphere...
You are a formidable writer, luv... :-*
You never cease to amaze and awe. Never would I have envisioned a swamp journey as transformative and positive, yet I have the pervasive feeling here that this journey is just that. At the end, the swampland are a desirable(?) goal. See? I am still skeptical, yet that is the atmosphere...
You are a formidable writer, luv... :-*
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re: Re: Night Swamp
23rd Aug 2014 6:55am
Not sure myself... I left the perspective a bit cloudy. Joy in closeness, no matter the setting.
Thank you, Sav...
Thank you, Sav...
Re: Night Swamp
22nd Aug 2014 2:13am
re: Re: Night Swamp
23rd Aug 2014 6:56am
Re: Night Swamp
22nd Aug 2014 4:01am
Great! very well done sir.
Let me know what you think about mine.
http://deepundergroundpoetry.com/poems/174417-in-the-mind-of-the-unbalanced/
Let me know what you think about mine.
http://deepundergroundpoetry.com/poems/174417-in-the-mind-of-the-unbalanced/
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re: Re: Night Swamp
23rd Aug 2014 6:57am
Re: Night Swamp
22nd Aug 2014 11:29am
These words you have written, magnificent indeed. A very well written poem.
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re: Re: Night Swamp
23rd Aug 2014 7:04am
Thank you, Ace, too kind, and I'm pleased to make your reading list. Welcome to DU!
Re: Night Swamp
Anonymous
22nd Aug 2014 11:59am
Good stuff Atakti, lot of fantastic language here... captures the reader... want to know more
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re: Re: Night Swamp
23rd Aug 2014 7:00am
I may indulge in a sequel... but ambivalence is still the star.
Many thanks, JT!
Many thanks, JT!
Re: Night Swamp
Anonymous
22nd Aug 2014 4:26pm
Sahwheeeeeeeeat wryte mizz atakey
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re: Re: Night Swamp
23rd Aug 2014 7:01am
Re: Night Swamp
reminds me of my ex(She was queen of telling all truths, only the lies excluded)
Scathing Ink!!!
Scathing Ink!!!
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re: Re: Night Swamp
23rd Aug 2014 7:03am
It's tricky, I'll agree with that! Soul, the truth is smack in the middle of the swamp, so pack sandwiches and a flashlight.
Thank for reading...
Thank for reading...
Re: Night Swamp
Anonymous
23rd Aug 2014 7:06am
A good poem and title ...the quicksands are almost sensed while reading...
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Re: Night Swamp
11th Nov 2014 7:43am
U have like 20 coments here so u dont need me to tell u this is awesome but anyways this is awesome
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