Preponderance

       What is this strange attraction, this unknown feeling that surges through the blood and beckons me into these odd doings? I feel I have been here once before, yet the place and time remain a mystery. I see the world as a movie on some large backdrop of screen, but despite my travels I am still no closer to breaking through the vale. What is the purpose to this experiment? The truth of the matter is that I am alone and confused here, and all I can think is that I want to go home, but where is home?

     More questions then answers in this place, and more sorrow than any other emotion. Some craft or work of art is upon me. Trying to create anything seems so pointless of an endeavor. I think looking within is the only way out. Where as some microscope could help to clearly see the hole in the back of my skull.  Pouring out such fantastic visions through the kaleidoscopic mirror hallway of the mind's landscape. The collective tininess, and lone immensity blend together and disturb me. I can not trust what I see before my eyes, and yet other than the blank darkness of the mind I am offered nothing else.

     Thought experiment number 1; from the stand point of an all knowing perspective, is it possible for one to be surprised? The knowledge to do anything should make this possible, that is the logical answer, but the how is where my interest is held fast. The wonders of delight, and the thrill of suspense   seems possible in a very round about way from the point of all things. The illusion of forgetting would seem to be a great necessity here, where the gradual learning of all things could bring one back to origin. Perhaps a slow process taking many different forms and seeming endless time, while paradoxically remaining whole all the while through whatever method. The preponderance of which still allude me. Then why ask the question then? Perhaps that is what gives me purpose.    

     What attracts me is this, the oneness, the heart, and maybe the only real thing there is.