deepundergroundpoetry.com
use me some other day.... under
you say you just want to abolish my hurt, when really you just wondered whats under my shirt.. so you come and lay down with me, hoping and praying that i'll get on my knees... just forget what we've done, i'll admit, it was kind of fun... you say you love me in every way, please, use me some other day...
Published 26th Mar 2011
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comments 7
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The author encourages honest critique.
26th Mar 2011 3:29pm
26th Mar 2011 4:12pm
29th Mar 2011 2:49am
29th Mar 2011 6:46pm
i sincerely, with every chunk of flesh nailed to my bones, hope you didnt write this about a.w.g.
see, if that were true, i'd have a problem.(:
we don't want to have a problem over something like that. see, the thing is that if you think he's using you, you don't understand him at all.
that would just mean you are stuck desiring smething unrealistic from him and not appreciating what you have.
i hope you pay attention for this, especially if you plan to carve it in your wrists like everyone knows you do.
you have, in your heart, the boy i have every intention of forever with. if you hurt so much as one hair on his head i can guarantee you will be sorry. i know things about him you wouldn't dream, the things he tells me, you simply wouldn't dream.
spread those rumors about me, like you like to do. it wont affect me anymore than me writing this for you.(:
maybe you've yet to understand. in my head, you're something of a homewrecker.
if everything was functioning, little old you was not needed to fix anything.
apologies will not be made,
Kristyn Ashley.
p.s., i hope you know this is probably one of the very first things i've said about you, contrary to popular belief. and you even got it in writing! in addition you may want to re-think some of your friends, as it appears to me that maybe 2/3 of them are on my side in this highschool war.
as for my views on this poem? it's very short, hardly long enough to count as a poem, as it's more of just a rhyming thought, like those cliche things people experience everyday. sorry to be so hurtful, but maybe you should like a dose of your own sick medicine.
see, if that were true, i'd have a problem.(:
we don't want to have a problem over something like that. see, the thing is that if you think he's using you, you don't understand him at all.
that would just mean you are stuck desiring smething unrealistic from him and not appreciating what you have.
i hope you pay attention for this, especially if you plan to carve it in your wrists like everyone knows you do.
you have, in your heart, the boy i have every intention of forever with. if you hurt so much as one hair on his head i can guarantee you will be sorry. i know things about him you wouldn't dream, the things he tells me, you simply wouldn't dream.
spread those rumors about me, like you like to do. it wont affect me anymore than me writing this for you.(:
maybe you've yet to understand. in my head, you're something of a homewrecker.
if everything was functioning, little old you was not needed to fix anything.
apologies will not be made,
Kristyn Ashley.
p.s., i hope you know this is probably one of the very first things i've said about you, contrary to popular belief. and you even got it in writing! in addition you may want to re-think some of your friends, as it appears to me that maybe 2/3 of them are on my side in this highschool war.
as for my views on this poem? it's very short, hardly long enough to count as a poem, as it's more of just a rhyming thought, like those cliche things people experience everyday. sorry to be so hurtful, but maybe you should like a dose of your own sick medicine.
14th Jul 2011 11:26pm
1st Jul 2011 1:22pm
Wow, and I'm not talking about the poem. I think I'll go get some popcorn for this one.
Oh yeah, the poem... I almost forgot. It needs to be formatted better because it reads like a note passed in the classroom right now, there's no flow to it whatsoever.
That's a pity because I actually like the idea of the poem. You need some line breaks, they are your friend, and much better that hundreds of ellipses all over the place...
Oh yeah, the poem... I almost forgot. It needs to be formatted better because it reads like a note passed in the classroom right now, there's no flow to it whatsoever.
That's a pity because I actually like the idea of the poem. You need some line breaks, they are your friend, and much better that hundreds of ellipses all over the place...
