a shattered dream

 When I first saw you, you caught my eye. I felt your pain and wanted to take it away,

The first time we met I had no words, speechless an uncomfortable place for me,

From that point on I desired your company, your love, your everything.

The first time we touched was exciting, confusing and I found myself afraid.

I feared letting you into my world, my mind and most of all my heart.

You melted my fears away and with one cold breath built them back up.

This hot and cold has wasted me away-- am I no longer what you desire?

When you leave my heart sinks my stomach twists and my mind plays tricks on me.

I seek you out and welcome you back into my life with open arms..
only you know what you have done!

We talk and work through it, you are full of answers with complicated plots
I feel like a part of me has been destroyed.

You tell me you love me and I comply, This is no way for me to live.

I know that nothing good comes easy but with what I see where do I fit in?

You asked me to understand and I tried, honestly I have just to see another curtain open to another confusing dilemma.

You tell me what I want to hear not what I need to hear.

I have been there for you,  faithfully, committed and supportive not asking much in my opinion.

I am unreasonable, you say, as you lay with another woman excusing it as a break up when you left without a word.

Now I find myself engulfed in the pain as I were smoke in a bubble just waiting to pop.
I turn to you and look deeply into your eyes and I see a sparkle of hope, only to find the sparkle is a sharp object between your fingers heading toward my bubble. You trivialize my doubt as the smoke is whisked away by a puff of breath from your luscious lips.

When I walked away you thought I was kidding as you said you waited for me to walk back through the doors.

How much can I withstand before I need to retreat and let the wounds heal?

I thought being away from you was going to be easy, oh how wrong I was.
I feel like I am missing my arms and legs as you have become a part of my being in my mind.. but obviously not yours .

There comes a time where I have to count my losses tuck my tail and walk.
I feel that time has come my dream is shattered.

I pick up the pieces hoping that someday I will be able to put them back together and we will once again be whole, then i see the truth, there's too much damage for even me to repair.

Head hung low, a knot in my throat i try to mutter the words I LOVE YOU...

Right then I realize that I truly do and the best way to display it is to drop the pieces as I walk away.

I hope someone comes along this way and finds these pieces and has the patience to put it back together.

As it was the most beautiful thing I had ever dreamed..

                                                             goodbye my love.