deepundergroundpoetry.com
Forever
Love is that which we strive to obtain,
We live our lives longing for it's embrace.
And when we are finally wrapped in its arms
and know that this is true love,
We hang on for the rest of our lives.
Our time together is still young,
But forever is just around the corner.
We live our lives longing for it's embrace.
And when we are finally wrapped in its arms
and know that this is true love,
We hang on for the rest of our lives.
Our time together is still young,
But forever is just around the corner.
Published 19th Mar 2011
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20th Mar 2011 1:39pm
6th Dec 2014 1:26am
Very powerful. Though I think it could use more imagery. Also, you do not need to add the extra space after each line, nor the punctuation after most of the lines. It makes the poem seem semi-newbie poet-ish. And you may have just started out back in 2011 but I just feel as though the poem is a bit cluttered and that I want to see more, know what the arms feel like.
I hope this helps you. Great write and I look forward to reading more soon.
Pen on,
Jaimee-Leigh
I hope this helps you. Great write and I look forward to reading more soon.
Pen on,
Jaimee-Leigh
