Passing time

"My love, what will you do with this mess?" You came drunk again to a messy apartment. But the mess was yours, all your clothes scattered in the living room where I was waiting on you.

"The only thing I can do, dispose of it." You were a wreck I had to get rid of. If I had any intentions of doing something with my life, I had to move away.




It had been too long since we threw everything we had into abyss and went our separate ways. You kept going on in your random love affairs after work, and I kept myself to myself; have you ever been able to sleep a single night with no one next to your naked body?

I traced the records of us and our so called "happy life" from when we met. Everything so vague and chaotic only a psycho could understand. But that's how we would relate right? Your crazy over-the-top lifestyle and my willingness to lose control of it all attitude.




"What are you thinking about Ren?" You asked. The times where you were sober were so rare they filled my heart with hope.

"About us, and the past..." You had always been crazy, outgoing, and I loved it. But I had been wondering if you would ever out grow this stage of your life.

"Why do you always think about the past! That's all you ever do!" The fight started and soon enough you would leave again.

"I was just thinking of how lucky we got with this deal." Dealing wasn't the safest job, nor a legal one. But it was all you knew how to do and I was just someone who got caught up in this life.

"The deal was done and over with. You can't ever let things go, there's no point in thinking about what's already done! I'm leaving." And with that, you left the room, heard you take the keys from the counter and slammed the door. I knew where you going but didn't matter to go look for you. G was your best friends in times like these, and alcohol was your holy water.