deepundergroundpoetry.com

longing to feel for one

look into my eyes..
do you see it..
can you feel my pain..
this anguish from within..
still unsolved by me..
the last piece far from hand..
you thought..
yet a mystery..
for all to see..
your eyes so soft..
deep and intriguing..
to yet any mans soul..
my thoughts of you..
grow evermore..
as I sit here alone..
in the shadows..
of an unforsaking light..
which burdens my soul..
with every breath I take..
I remorse to the time..
I say you first..
it puzzled me then..
and it puzzles me now..
as I sit here alone..
picturing you in my head..
like I do in my dreams..
and I do every chance I get..
and I remember so vividly..
that day you walked by..
throwing a smirk..
a smile..
and for one brief moment..
my life stood still..
and all that I had..
were these gestures..
these questions..
rolling thru my head..
is now my chance..
is it truly my time..
and yet as I looked down..
for the courage I lacked..
all that I could see..
was you face..
it seemed to glimmer..
in every piece..
this puzzle has to offer..
you embracement what I seek..
all that I want..
your thought infatuating..
to yet my very soul..
its different I say..
it's not as it seems..
it's truly hard for me..
to feel for one..
it's such a rarity..
scarcely seen to like of me..
dear lord..
she's all that I seek..
she's a purity..
yet unspoken..
to a person such as I..
if only it were different..
oh lord..
trust me..
if I'd chosen a different life..
I might break this mold..
and things could change..
and I could truly tell her..
of this way I do feel..
but I didn't..
and I'm paying for it now..
in ways she'll never imagine..
in ways she'll never feel..
I want to claim..
what I believe right..
oh lord..
let me feel one..
just this once..
for I want to feel freedom..
in my hands once more..
but the barriers all but broken..
for their still standing..
so strong and tall..
I'd ask her for help..
in whichever way she would..
but it's not for me to do..
for I've chosen the highest right..
to suffer and to love..
the one real feeling..
to which I know is true..
it was my choice..
and my own doing..
that brought me here..
this fine damned day..
and doom my soul..
to play this puzzle..
which has no end..
for already..
I have passed start..
what a pity..
for it was I..
who placed that piece..
and chose my right..
no others..
just I..
and I alone..

don't overlook a pure heart.......take it in you arms.....and guard it with all you might......