I Can't Right

So adhere I am to my failed attempt
My less than writing contempt
I feel stray, alone; unkempt
My body loathes rest
I can't read, or digest

No matter my effort, I place dead last
Here is to my crew;
Thanks for the cast
When it is all done it is said
To be past
I think what a thought to forget
What memoirs regret so fast

If I headed my way
I'd shy away pain in stance it came
I'd shun it's very shame width
I'd do so away with the spite in me,
To spare my height, I shallow
The bottom of my depth
Although it has proved aimless,
I shall continue to play pawn, like chess
I'll come back; I'll regress