The Tragedy of Falling in Love with the Anti-Hero Every Time

I have poisoned
Myself, it would seem.
So easily,
I think I have let
Myself be
Destroyed.
Because, you see;
I've got this sick void
Inside my stomach and
When I swallow my
Words, they get caught;
Undigested to burn
Like bile in my throat,
And so I can't forget
The regret and stupidity
I have soaked in.
You see -
My insides are basking
In mercury and
I can't remember what I
Was before you.
My seams are coming
Undone.
It's like my bones have twisted;
Slowly, though, out of joint,
And I am
Eternally uncomforted.
Like every word I write in
Memory of any shadow I
Ever had that was Happiness
In my life is creeping upon
Me and soffocating my
Mediocre heart.
I swear I feel like I'm drowning.
My lungs are about
To burst but my
Lips have been sewn and
They're swollen shut after
What you've done.
I can't breathe because
Of the heaviness!
There is lead beneath my skin,
I swear!
And my ribcage has evolved
To steel.
My eyes have wires to keep them
Always open
On these nights, but they're
Tripped,
You see, and the disorientation
Of all the shadows and dark
Places of my room
Are existensial.
These lines are sluggish
But I am terrified.
My heart is palpitating and
Erratic and I
Wonder why you ever thought
You could help me.
Because clearly
I am beyond what it is to
Be fixed.