Freedom

I could ask myself a million questions
with a million answers
but still, where would I arrive if I did?
I could sprint in circles around
the crippling memories from years past  
and run marathons with thoughts of the future.
But, I would still be left with a burning
need to know,
a need of passion and desire that
does not, and will not ever exist  
between us.
 
I continue to wonder a thousand "what if's?"
and a hundred "if I was only better's"...  
only to come to conclusions that it was not I,
but you who was at fault.
You, you who poured gasoline filled with  
lies over my head and set it aflame.
You who spat in my face and
kicked dirt in my eyes
to satisfy your own animalistic desires.
 
But me?
I will be the one who watches your flesh burn
and melt in the flames of your own evil actions.
Your eyes will be the ones to sting with  
the grit of sand and dirt and
you will feel the pain of my foot in your face.
I will no longer be your victim.
 
I will allow no shame in disclosing my feelings
towards you, no disgrace in being in love.
I will no longer bear these scars in embarrassment.
I have moved on to higher grounds
where I can  
finally be
free.