So confused

One minute I love you, one minute I hate you
All of these confusing emotions trapped
By all these experiences that have overlapped
I keep thinking and replaying what you put me through
My heart doesn't know what to do
I can't get you out of my head like the lyrics to my favourite song
Why does not having you around feel so wrong?
I try to follow my heart but it keeps leading me to you
I feel like I had SAD which is also known as the winter blues We keep crossing each others paths
But I can't forget the aftermaths
I keep putting all the horrible things you did in the back of my head
Seeing you all the time is what I dread
Because deep inside I haven't gotten over it
I haven't gotten over the love I had for you
I need to breakthrough
But how can I when my feelings for you are so strong and deeply imbedded
You are the poison that has been injected
I only got upset all of the time because I cared
No ones love for you will ever compare.