Catalog the heartbreak

   
He doesn't want me anymore.    
     
blindsided. been 4 weeks, head still ringing.      
     
all day cannot take a deep breath    
     
last night fucked a distant friend;    
did not feel much    
gut a vortex    
     
heart only calms a few seconds    
on the train passing over the water    
     
at work, as soon as the bathroom door      
swings shut-    
my knees give out, i let it out.