deepundergroundpoetry.com

'Let Go'

Loves pain,
Is humanities loss,
Yet you gained,
And became cross,
The years of torture,
Neglect and sorrow,
Filled your heart,
'til you believed there'd be no tomorrow.
Yet you never wept,
And so these tears I cry,
Are filled with your regret,
Because now there is no you and I,
And since the day we first met,
Until the moment
That I die,
I shall never forget,
The love we once had.
The love they said
Would never last,
The love you
Let go.

Written by gabbit

(Louise)

Published 23rd Sep 2009

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Jenerator (Jenna)

23rd Sep 2009 11:51am

Great ending! Rhyming was superb. I love the opening words; "Loves pain" Can be thought of as two aspects.
"Love is pain" - Which i'm sure is the way you were intending. Depicting something beautiful can become something horrible. Describing that love hurts. Which is very true.

Or "Loves pain" - How you have written it. Portraying a different feeling, describing that (he/she) loves pain. So the relationship has ended in a need to look for hurt. I know that isnt what you were writing, but when I first read it, your miss to put in punctuation "Love's Pain" made me think that it was this way at first, until I read the rest. But I discovered that it works either way. Fantastic :)