My old friend

Dear Brittany,
Why did you have to take everything I said out of context?
You had to act like all I wanted was a pulled stitch
No, wait, I said the wrong thing, used the wrong tone
Who'd have thought I could be such a mean bitch?

Coulda, woulda, shoulda done more for you
Shoulda cut my own wrists for you
I couldn't tell your heart was breaking
Maybe the only thing is how you were shaking
Making a fool of your love and gleam
Right, right I did the wrong thing and acted real mean

Maybe I'd taken it back before I said one word
Maybe I'd kept still and waited for you to laugh
Haha yeah lets laugh it off
I know we sound so dumb being pissed off

Oh god yeah that was all so silly
You never meant to tell me how you feel
However I stumbled in, like always hoping you'd take me around
Let me go around with you in your wheel
I have no will to make you say sorry
You never did wrong, you couldn't do wrong
Incapable of hurting another life
Respectful of living and dying
Dead or alive I knew you felt something in all their eyes

A little birdie in your jar of baking soda
Everywhere you went he was sure to follow
"He smells, he wreaks" everyone yelled
I'll have to admit I was a little creeped
Nevertheless, I saw what you meant
In your intention I never saw a dent

Back then I loved you, envied you, lusted over you
Wanted to be the only one there for you
Now I'm wondering which one of those were wrong
If I never felt any of it maybe you'd still be around
I can't stand it I don't wanna go on
Not so long, so long with out you
Too many months going on years and years
I never get to see your face
None your laughter in my ears

I'm not saying sorry for being a bitch
I'm apologizing for not knowing
How would I know I could ever make you itch?
Fuck it I am sorry
Sorry I'm the one and altogether not
It's sick what I'd do for you
The fact that I feel for you
Pathetic that I waste the time to think of you
I'd be ok and forget if I just didn't have dreams of your face
Now please disappear from my mind.
Let me go on on believing you heard all this and said "never mind"
Sincerely forever your friend...