He Haunts

 I kissed him in the rain
And it was with that that the pain
My, my, my could that boy kiss
He is my favorite by far and he is the one I most miss
Even now the memory makes my heart ache
The way he would press my back against the wall, how I wish I could forget for my sanity's sake
I miss tangling my hands in his curls and stare into his stormy eyes
Because it was only then that he wouldnt tell lies
He was only boy I've hated as much as loved
For he was the only one who's hands were never gloved
In the middle of the night the memory of him comes to me
Leaving me wanting to weep, for he's the real life boy who never said good bye
I love him and I always will but I have let him go
Though I love him so much it still hurts when he floats to the top of my mind and messes up my thought flow
My heart must hate me
For it loves the one boy who isn't able to love at all, all he gives is bliss or misery
For the moment I am around him I hold my breath to try to make the moment last
But no matter how hard I try it always goes too fast
He rebreaks my heart  again and again
Someday he'll either stay or I'll tell him to finally forever go and stop this endless cycle of sin