Sleepless

It’s been said far too many times
The teddy isn’t comforting enough
The blankets are cold
The bed too large
(it’s downsized and yet there’s still too much space)
 
I say everything too much because
I’m afraid
You’ll forget them if I pause
Long enough to breathe
 
I’m tossing and turning
Restless in the grip of
Nightmares that mock me with your face
And your name on my lips as I’m released from
Hel
And all her promises of half-dead romance
 
I say things too much because
I’m scared
I’ll forget how to express
Everything
 
It’s been said far too many times
You make the bad things go away
The nights are perfect
The time endless
(if only I could stop it when we needed to… all the time)
 
I say things too much because
I don’t know
How to say them
‘Just enough’
 
Time and distance are one and the same
And you’re far too long away from me
For anything to be comfortable in this
Un-dead dream that
Threatens my reality
 
(did you know you keep me real?)