Fuck

Staring at the foil again;
  Straw hanging to the side of my parted lips.
 Lighter in hand, anticipating the high about to take me.

I hesitate at the sight;
  My hands quiver as I inhale deeply; slowly.
 Soon, hesitation is no longer a factor when I light my demon.

What started as a fun time,
  Quickly took me by the soul and clenched its jaws down.
 No future without it is seen, any longer.

I used to swear to never touch it.
  My will was strong and my mind made up in stone.
 Cursing out those close to me nodding in and out.

But when I get the brown stone in hand,
  I lose all my will, all control, all my sense.
 Shaking and sweating, I inhale again.

I say no needle will puncture my veins.
  I promise those who have gone down that road.
 But who knows these days?

I have let go to this demon...
  I have number out all my will...
     I am high again, trying to get higher.