dropping away (Daddy's gone)

He is leaving once more
away from me… back to His life
i miss Him even before he goes
cling to Him for hours beforehand

i feel empty and cold as He drives away
my stomach twisted and knotted
i hate the way it feels inside
as i watch His tail lights disappear

now i have just reminders
i smell His scent faintly on my skin
i hear His voice echoing in my ears
i see his eyes every time i close mine

these ghosts help me
for a day or two…
and then it hits me all at once
the drop….

it’s like falling out of a plane
and down a deep dark well
filled with snakes and spiders
a cold and scary place

i lay in bed and fight tears
wanting to feel His arms again
telling myself it is just the drop
and it will go away soon

He holds my hand from afar
tells me He is proud of me
tells me He misses and loves me
tells me the bad feeling will pass

i send Him pictures
of bruises and bite marks
as they get darker
then begin to fade

the drop passes eventually
i start anticipating His next visit
excited that He is returning
dreading that He will leave again