Submissions by shadowkissed (Montana Redd)
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
Poet Introduction
"i act like shit don't phase me, inside it drives me crazy. my insecurities could eat me alive"
SELF POEM
Published
19th Aug 2015 2:02am
19th Aug 2015 2:02am
all these things
I can't tell you how many times I've had to hold back tears in the middle of class to avoid looking weak.
I can't tell you how much I love him and constantly want to talk to him but don't to avoid being the clingy person I am
I can't tell you how much I stray from mirrors to avoid tears.
I can't tell you how much I hate my weight and want to change but lack the energy to do so
I can't tell you how much I cry at night or cry in general due to just feeling shitty
I can't tell you how many times I've been in that much pain I wished I could just not...
I can't tell you how much I love him and constantly want to talk to him but don't to avoid being the clingy person I am
I can't tell you how much I stray from mirrors to avoid tears.
I can't tell you how much I hate my weight and want to change but lack the energy to do so
I can't tell you how much I cry at night or cry in general due to just feeling shitty
I can't tell you how many times I've been in that much pain I wished I could just not...
612 reads
1 Comment
SELF POEM
Published
4th Feb 2014 2:39am
4th Feb 2014 2:39am
Untitled
slit my wrists
let the blood pour out
watch my breathing slow and my heart go cold
let the pain subside
and the heartache diminish
let me go in peace as my soul flies free
my heart is yours
do as you please
don't cry or plead
this is for me
let the blood pour out
watch my breathing slow and my heart go cold
let the pain subside
and the heartache diminish
let me go in peace as my soul flies free
my heart is yours
do as you please
don't cry or plead
this is for me
563 reads
0 Comments
DARK POEM
Published
8th Jul 2013 10:17am
8th Jul 2013 10:17am
The Dead Sequence
Rip out my heart and slit my wrists
look into the face of a girl who's already dead
the medications and the pills give me a reason to live but can't destroy the fact that i'm dead inside
my eyes are dead
my lips are a pale blue
stitches cover the remainders of my broken heart
i wish i was dead, oh i wish i was dead
maybe then you'd feel sorry for the way you have treated me
i have no remorse
i have no emotions
he makes me happy when my own family makes me cry
if i can't live in a world with him then i don't want to live at all
scratch out my...
look into the face of a girl who's already dead
the medications and the pills give me a reason to live but can't destroy the fact that i'm dead inside
my eyes are dead
my lips are a pale blue
stitches cover the remainders of my broken heart
i wish i was dead, oh i wish i was dead
maybe then you'd feel sorry for the way you have treated me
i have no remorse
i have no emotions
he makes me happy when my own family makes me cry
if i can't live in a world with him then i don't want to live at all
scratch out my...
703 reads
1 Comment
SELF POEM
Published
23rd May 2013 4:22am
23rd May 2013 4:22am
A Letter To Myself
Depression
Anxiety
OCD
Recovering cutter
Suicidal
Anaemic
I hate my hair
I hate my eyes
I hate my nose
I hate my body
I hate myself
Fat
Ugly
No collarbones
No thigh gap
No motivation
No energy
No friends
“Emo”
“Ugly”
“Fat”
“Suicidal”
“Cutter”
“Bitch”
“Slut”
“Cunt”
“Disgusting”
“Different”
“Kill yourself”
No one cares
You’re not normal
Just kill yourself
No one would notice
You don’t deserve to live
What normal person...
Anxiety
OCD
Recovering cutter
Suicidal
Anaemic
I hate my hair
I hate my eyes
I hate my nose
I hate my body
I hate myself
Fat
Ugly
No collarbones
No thigh gap
No motivation
No energy
No friends
“Emo”
“Ugly”
“Fat”
“Suicidal”
“Cutter”
“Bitch”
“Slut”
“Cunt”
“Disgusting”
“Different”
“Kill yourself”
No one cares
You’re not normal
Just kill yourself
No one would notice
You don’t deserve to live
What normal person...
#anxiety
#depression
#mirror
828 reads
3 Comments
ANGER POEM
Published
6th May 2013 2:50am
6th May 2013 2:50am
What Conscience?
What are you going to do?
Stab me?
Get your tribe onto me?
Or beat me with a stick?
Or will you run from your problems like the little girl you are?
My body’s not perfect but yours is far from it
The scars that cover your stomach
The stretch marks on your body
or the cellulite on your thighs
or how about that you’re fat and you do nothing to change that.
I can’t believe I used to stand up for you, well someone had to do it
I made you who you are today
You’re a perfect replica of me, but not quite me
I have the controls
You’re just in the...
Stab me?
Get your tribe onto me?
Or beat me with a stick?
Or will you run from your problems like the little girl you are?
My body’s not perfect but yours is far from it
The scars that cover your stomach
The stretch marks on your body
or the cellulite on your thighs
or how about that you’re fat and you do nothing to change that.
I can’t believe I used to stand up for you, well someone had to do it
I made you who you are today
You’re a perfect replica of me, but not quite me
I have the controls
You’re just in the...
756 reads
0 Comments
DARK POEM
Published
16th Apr 2013 3:08am
16th Apr 2013 3:08am
A non important but rather unfortunate event
Blood drips from her veins
She clutches a rusted blade
Her only friend
The only one who can take her pain away
She’s bleeding out fast and doesn’t have much time
A mix of sweat and tears fall from her face
She can barely hear her parents arguing downstairs over breaking glass
They would never look for her here, the attic
It was her safe place, her solitude
But now she was going away, a vacation from the bad thoughts
She would never have to deal with them again
She takes the blade and eases it across her throat
Blood gushes from the slit...
She clutches a rusted blade
Her only friend
The only one who can take her pain away
She’s bleeding out fast and doesn’t have much time
A mix of sweat and tears fall from her face
She can barely hear her parents arguing downstairs over breaking glass
They would never look for her here, the attic
It was her safe place, her solitude
But now she was going away, a vacation from the bad thoughts
She would never have to deal with them again
She takes the blade and eases it across her throat
Blood gushes from the slit...
743 reads
1 Comment
DARK POEM
Published
26th Mar 2013 11:47am
26th Mar 2013 11:47am
Scattered Shards
The darkness is swallowing me whole
I have no room to breathe
I cut for the first time again today
Well I guess there goes five months down the drain
Oh well, it was worth it
A shard of glass slicing down my arm
What? I wasn’t going to let that broken cup go to waste mommy
The cold feeling of blood dripping down my arm
Just watching my skin spit blood out of my wound made me feel content
Oh, that, the cat must of scratched me again
Bad thoughts, bad thoughts everywhere
To cause myself pain, to make that scarlet red spill from my veins
I have no room to breathe
I cut for the first time again today
Well I guess there goes five months down the drain
Oh well, it was worth it
A shard of glass slicing down my arm
What? I wasn’t going to let that broken cup go to waste mommy
The cold feeling of blood dripping down my arm
Just watching my skin spit blood out of my wound made me feel content
Oh, that, the cat must of scratched me again
Bad thoughts, bad thoughts everywhere
To cause myself pain, to make that scarlet red spill from my veins
738 reads
3 Comments
LOVE POEM
Published
24th Mar 2013 11:22am
24th Mar 2013 11:22am
cold winds
I don’t feel right
I feel incomplete
I feel like a stoner without a bong
It must be true love, cause no one else can break my heart like you
I’m tired of being a fighter, the walls are crumbling down around me
The walls that keep me safe from the bad thoughts
My hairs a mess
My mind is scrambled
My sanity…. Gone
Can’t leave my bed
Insides are numb
Don’t know if I’m awake or asleep
Is this just a dream?
My head is ringing
My heart pounding
Another overdose? Fuck it why not
Somehow I’m still breathing
I ask myself why I’m...
I feel incomplete
I feel like a stoner without a bong
It must be true love, cause no one else can break my heart like you
I’m tired of being a fighter, the walls are crumbling down around me
The walls that keep me safe from the bad thoughts
My hairs a mess
My mind is scrambled
My sanity…. Gone
Can’t leave my bed
Insides are numb
Don’t know if I’m awake or asleep
Is this just a dream?
My head is ringing
My heart pounding
Another overdose? Fuck it why not
Somehow I’m still breathing
I ask myself why I’m...
709 reads
1 Comment
LOVE POEM
Published
22nd Mar 2013 8:05am
22nd Mar 2013 8:05am
Enough
My feelings are out of control
I’m starting to realise I’m not the girl I thought I was
I feel incomplete
I think about him more than I should..
I can’t cope anymore
One minute I’m happy and the next I’m close to ripping throats out
And he’s an asshole, but I love him
I’m confused
I’m inlove
And now I know why people are afraid to fall inlove, it’s because it hurts like hell when you lose it
But one of the worst things about having your heart broken, is wondering if you’ll ever open up that far again
I wouldn’t be surprised if my body just ran...
I’m starting to realise I’m not the girl I thought I was
I feel incomplete
I think about him more than I should..
I can’t cope anymore
One minute I’m happy and the next I’m close to ripping throats out
And he’s an asshole, but I love him
I’m confused
I’m inlove
And now I know why people are afraid to fall inlove, it’s because it hurts like hell when you lose it
But one of the worst things about having your heart broken, is wondering if you’ll ever open up that far again
I wouldn’t be surprised if my body just ran...
814 reads
0 Comments
LOVE POEM
Published
21st Mar 2013 12:49pm
21st Mar 2013 12:49pm
you're the fire to my gasoline
I want you to stay and be mine forever mine, and only mine
I admit I get jealous when other girls are around you
When I see you hug one of your close friends something eats at my insides
I wish you knew how much I cared
I wish you knew that a single hello from you could brighten my day
I want to be the one to wipe away your tears
I want to be the one who makes you smile
I want to be the one who makes you happy
Your smile is so beautiful, you make me want to smile at the saddest of times
You’re gorgeous
I know it must sound weird for a guy to be...
I admit I get jealous when other girls are around you
When I see you hug one of your close friends something eats at my insides
I wish you knew how much I cared
I wish you knew that a single hello from you could brighten my day
I want to be the one to wipe away your tears
I want to be the one who makes you smile
I want to be the one who makes you happy
Your smile is so beautiful, you make me want to smile at the saddest of times
You’re gorgeous
I know it must sound weird for a guy to be...
1295 reads
2 Comments
LOVE POEM
Published
18th Mar 2013 11:46am
18th Mar 2013 11:46am
Deja' Vu
I’m sorry I want your love
I’m sorry I caused you pain
And I’m sorry that I’m not perfect
But tell me, is it so wrong for us to be together?
Is it wrong that I want to brush my lips against yours?
And is it wrong that I want to intertwine my body with yours?
There’s something about you, you’re different
You’re not like the others
Your touch sends shivers down my spine and leaves me begging for more
No matter what the circumstances, you’re always in the back of my mind
You seem to be invading my dreams and stealing my heart
You take away my night...
I’m sorry I caused you pain
And I’m sorry that I’m not perfect
But tell me, is it so wrong for us to be together?
Is it wrong that I want to brush my lips against yours?
And is it wrong that I want to intertwine my body with yours?
There’s something about you, you’re different
You’re not like the others
Your touch sends shivers down my spine and leaves me begging for more
No matter what the circumstances, you’re always in the back of my mind
You seem to be invading my dreams and stealing my heart
You take away my night...
806 reads
3 Comments
SELF POEM
Published
17th Mar 2013 11:15pm
17th Mar 2013 11:15pm
Fake
Isn’t it funny how you can hide so much with a single smile?
Funny how you can fake a decent smile when you’re breaking inside
Funny how you’re the reason for these scars
I smile so no one knows I’m on the edge
On the edge of jumping..
Funny how you can fake a decent smile when you’re breaking inside
Funny how you’re the reason for these scars
I smile so no one knows I’m on the edge
On the edge of jumping..
808 reads
3 Comments
DU Poetry : Submissions by shadowkissed (Montana Redd)
