Submissions by rebekka

I could not stop thinking about your smile after we bumped into each other.
It was like when summer meets autumn and all the colours are more beautiful than you remembered and the weather is just right, and the way the leaves fall with every gust of wind brings you a feeling of serenity like nothing else.
But then winter arrives and it's nice at first.
The snow falls so perfectly and everything is still beautiful, just not in the same way.
The air gets colder, It's harder to be around,
You were harder to be around.
Knowing you could never love me again was like...

I ran for four blocks before i lost him
Four blocks before i realized what was happening
Four blocks before I could even articulate the words “i am going to call the cops”
These four blocks seemed like the longest four blocks of my life
Four blocks of him chasing after me
Four blocks of him threatening to kill me

Four years of flashbacks
Four years of waking up from reoccurring nightmares
Four years of me having to pretend like this meant nothing
Four years of having to see him so often, every birthday party, every holiday dinner, every family...

He wanted to share everything with me,
I had forgotten how to share, I took his everything.
He wanted to hold me,
All I did was hold him back.
He tried to love me,
I did not try at all.