Submissions by razorsandblades (Phycho)
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
Poet Introduction
I honestly don't know what to put here.. Hi.
DRUGS POEM
Published
31st Mar 2014 4:45am
31st Mar 2014 4:45am
I Don't Know
I introduced my friend
To the wand I use to fight.
The wand I fight off
My own deepest inner thoughts with.
He kept saying,
"This is so much fun. The smoke is so beautiful in the breeze."
I wanted to break down
And tell him that I was sorry in that second.
But he wasn't hooked on it.
He just likes to play.
A simple, meer toy to him.
But a much bigger effect for me.
Yesterday, my dearest offered me something else.
A much stronger weapon that he himself uses.
I declined, fearing my family's reaction if they smelled it....
To the wand I use to fight.
The wand I fight off
My own deepest inner thoughts with.
He kept saying,
"This is so much fun. The smoke is so beautiful in the breeze."
I wanted to break down
And tell him that I was sorry in that second.
But he wasn't hooked on it.
He just likes to play.
A simple, meer toy to him.
But a much bigger effect for me.
Yesterday, my dearest offered me something else.
A much stronger weapon that he himself uses.
I declined, fearing my family's reaction if they smelled it....
684 reads
0 Comments
SONG LYRICS
Published
30th Mar 2014 4:59am
30th Mar 2014 4:59am
Smoke and Suicide
One more breath.
Please one more.
My head is consuming me and
My lungs ache. But this
Is my only remedy
And my only salvation.
This not addiction.
This is fascination,
Exploration, and
Desperation.
I am being consumed and choked
By my own thoughts.
I don't see many reasons
To get up in the morning,
And I function as a human being.
That's why I'm so busy all the damn time;
To have a reason.. To get excited.
This not addiction.
This is fascination,
Exploration, and
Desperation.
I am being consumed...
Please one more.
My head is consuming me and
My lungs ache. But this
Is my only remedy
And my only salvation.
This not addiction.
This is fascination,
Exploration, and
Desperation.
I am being consumed and choked
By my own thoughts.
I don't see many reasons
To get up in the morning,
And I function as a human being.
That's why I'm so busy all the damn time;
To have a reason.. To get excited.
This not addiction.
This is fascination,
Exploration, and
Desperation.
I am being consumed...
745 reads
2 Comments
SONG LYRICS
Published
30th Mar 2014 4:23am
30th Mar 2014 4:23am
Psychotic Soul
I'm stuck in my room again.
All alone, but not really,
The voices in my head and the creatures facing reality
My only escape is a wand of death
Slowly killing me but not enough to end my breath
No, seems like nothing can sometimes.
I'm stuck in my room again.
Safe, but I'm not.
See, these creatures want me to rot,
To kill me. But in a way,
They are my friends.
They may be just that.
I'm stuck in my room again.
Wanting to die but knowing
There's too much blowing.
My friends, my family, my dearest,
Would follow me...
All alone, but not really,
The voices in my head and the creatures facing reality
My only escape is a wand of death
Slowly killing me but not enough to end my breath
No, seems like nothing can sometimes.
I'm stuck in my room again.
Safe, but I'm not.
See, these creatures want me to rot,
To kill me. But in a way,
They are my friends.
They may be just that.
I'm stuck in my room again.
Wanting to die but knowing
There's too much blowing.
My friends, my family, my dearest,
Would follow me...
677 reads
2 Comments
LOVE POEM
Published
8th Jul 2013 3:47pm
8th Jul 2013 3:47pm
I didn't know it'd hurt this much..
I told you goodbye,
That I'd come home soon to see you.
I planned to spend all of independence break with you
But I only saw you one time
And it broke my heart
Squeezed it so hard that I shook
With tear of regret and heartache
To feel you with me one last time
Before I had to leave again.
I'm so sorry.
That I'd come home soon to see you.
I planned to spend all of independence break with you
But I only saw you one time
And it broke my heart
Squeezed it so hard that I shook
With tear of regret and heartache
To feel you with me one last time
Before I had to leave again.
I'm so sorry.
634 reads
0 Comments
NON-FICTION PROSE
Published
31st Mar 2013 4:23am
31st Mar 2013 4:23am
Time
Such a long time since a lot of things, lately. I haven't felt like this in so very long. So many things come back to me now and then, just.. memories. And a lot of them sting pretty hard. I miss her.
729 reads
2 Comments
SONG LYRICS
Published
14th Mar 2013 3:21am
14th Mar 2013 3:21am
Time Machine
When I was a kid, I thought I'd build a time machine
And I'd go off to a far off land
to a far off place
and a far off time where everything was happy (everything was happy)
Oh how naive I was
Oh how blind I was!
There is no time that's been happy.
I wanna time machine that can bring me to a perfect place
Where there's no bull shit and no time to waste
Where nothing can touch me
and I can't touch anything.
Where the sun shines on everything
and music comes from nowhere and everywhere (nowhere and everywhere)
This is what I...
And I'd go off to a far off land
to a far off place
and a far off time where everything was happy (everything was happy)
Oh how naive I was
Oh how blind I was!
There is no time that's been happy.
I wanna time machine that can bring me to a perfect place
Where there's no bull shit and no time to waste
Where nothing can touch me
and I can't touch anything.
Where the sun shines on everything
and music comes from nowhere and everywhere (nowhere and everywhere)
This is what I...
686 reads
0 Comments
SONG LYRICS
Published
8th Mar 2013 3:58pm
8th Mar 2013 3:58pm
Fate?
Say, won't you come with me?
My mind is empty, quiet like the sea
I'm listening babe
There's records to be made
I faked to heed your warning
And now I dread the morning
Every night, I lay awake
Staring at the ceiling, the tears of fate
Sliding away from me
Come back..
I want to die
I want to fly
Don't chain me down
Hand me the death crown
Let me recieve my fate, darling.
Sittin' a-round, waitin for the town to, sleep.
Sittin' a-round, waitin for the hound to, sleep.
"Roaw roaw roaw!" roars the mutt...
My mind is empty, quiet like the sea
I'm listening babe
There's records to be made
I faked to heed your warning
And now I dread the morning
Every night, I lay awake
Staring at the ceiling, the tears of fate
Sliding away from me
Come back..
I want to die
I want to fly
Don't chain me down
Hand me the death crown
Let me recieve my fate, darling.
Sittin' a-round, waitin for the town to, sleep.
Sittin' a-round, waitin for the hound to, sleep.
"Roaw roaw roaw!" roars the mutt...
719 reads
0 Comments
SELF POEM
Published
8th Mar 2013 00:16am
8th Mar 2013 00:16am
Stuffed Greed
This is what I'm talking about
When my belly is full
I feel disgusting
I feel like making myself vomit
Because I don't deserve this
Because anyone else deserves a big meal with a loving family
Than I do
And this bloatting makes me feel even fatter
Than I probably am
And these thoughts racing through me
Making me dizzy
Nauseous
Whispering silently
Wishing for me to disappear
Hoping for me to disappear
Just like everyone else
Including me
Family
Let me starve
Let me bleed
Leave me to die
Please
When my belly is full
I feel disgusting
I feel like making myself vomit
Because I don't deserve this
Because anyone else deserves a big meal with a loving family
Than I do
And this bloatting makes me feel even fatter
Than I probably am
And these thoughts racing through me
Making me dizzy
Nauseous
Whispering silently
Wishing for me to disappear
Hoping for me to disappear
Just like everyone else
Including me
Family
Let me starve
Let me bleed
Leave me to die
Please
592 reads
0 Comments
DARK POEM
Published
7th Mar 2013 11:05pm
7th Mar 2013 11:05pm
Not Worth It
Thanks
For all your darling lies
Your failed help
But I'll just keep pushing away
Its normal to me
To not feel loved
Appreciated
So this all of a sudden increase of attention and love
It's uncomfortable and awkward
And when you crush me with a good-meaning embrace
The guilt climbs higher as
The fragile band-aids and scabs on my heart begin
To break and peel off
Again
So I ask you,
After 4 years of dealing with constant
Emotional abuse
Is it really all that horrible to be
This fucked up?
I'd say no
But that's...
For all your darling lies
Your failed help
But I'll just keep pushing away
Its normal to me
To not feel loved
Appreciated
So this all of a sudden increase of attention and love
It's uncomfortable and awkward
And when you crush me with a good-meaning embrace
The guilt climbs higher as
The fragile band-aids and scabs on my heart begin
To break and peel off
Again
So I ask you,
After 4 years of dealing with constant
Emotional abuse
Is it really all that horrible to be
This fucked up?
I'd say no
But that's...
939 reads
2 Comments
SELF POEM
Published
7th Mar 2013 12:42pm
7th Mar 2013 12:42pm
Hatred
I can't believe I'm such a little shit
There's times where I can say I've done.. okay.
But I've never been good enough
And I've never been good enough
For myself
And other people
I feel like an ass in therapy
Because afterwords, Dad always asks me "How many more times are you going to have to go?"
And my answer is always, "I don't know."
I'm despised and rumoured about
I'm hated and unwanted
Unworthy
And I'm partially okay with this
It's been so long since I've felt
Special
There's times where I can say I've done.. okay.
But I've never been good enough
And I've never been good enough
For myself
And other people
I feel like an ass in therapy
Because afterwords, Dad always asks me "How many more times are you going to have to go?"
And my answer is always, "I don't know."
I'm despised and rumoured about
I'm hated and unwanted
Unworthy
And I'm partially okay with this
It's been so long since I've felt
Special
640 reads
0 Comments
SONG LYRICS
Published
7th Mar 2013 3:52am
7th Mar 2013 3:52am
Tears
Tears
Makes the time feel like years
I just can't explain
This numb, soulless pain.
I want out. I want out.
It hurts too much to bare
I'm falling deep into despair
Once again, woah.
As these tears fall down my face
You stand there laughing at my case
I miss you; I love you
I hate you; I faked you
And all these uncanny things
Twisting my heart apart
Just twisting my heart apart
And these tears bring my numbness to a halt
I don't know why I'm happy for this to start.
These cuts these bruises cover my body
And...
Makes the time feel like years
I just can't explain
This numb, soulless pain.
I want out. I want out.
It hurts too much to bare
I'm falling deep into despair
Once again, woah.
As these tears fall down my face
You stand there laughing at my case
I miss you; I love you
I hate you; I faked you
And all these uncanny things
Twisting my heart apart
Just twisting my heart apart
And these tears bring my numbness to a halt
I don't know why I'm happy for this to start.
These cuts these bruises cover my body
And...
733 reads
1 Comment
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