Submissions by DaxterDux (Dax)
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
Stuck
As I sit and wonder
Anxiety flows as almost if from a faucet.
I’m stuck in this place and I’m pretending.
Sat between where things meet one side expecting, one side demanding.
Droplets on my eyelids to heavy to wrestle.
When will I learn to move through these things?
It’s like being trapped in mud.
Collecting the trauma like leaves fallen.
All to stuff it down and let it harden with the rest.
Swimming to the surface just for a breath.
Sinking back slowly.
It’s not certain death
Just
Stuck.
Anxiety flows as almost if from a faucet.
I’m stuck in this place and I’m pretending.
Sat between where things meet one side expecting, one side demanding.
Droplets on my eyelids to heavy to wrestle.
When will I learn to move through these things?
It’s like being trapped in mud.
Collecting the trauma like leaves fallen.
All to stuff it down and let it harden with the rest.
Swimming to the surface just for a breath.
Sinking back slowly.
It’s not certain death
Just
Stuck.
#anxiety
#depression
#LifeStruggles
#MentalHealth
#sadness
147 reads
2 Comments
What they never know
Desires swirl in the mist
One could grab them if not for the doubt
All the self loathing permeable
But lovers requiem loud and resounding
They are there to staunch the flow and heal the wounds
it’s all about the ones they never know
Trickling in and tearing flesh
Holding virtue to themselves
All will crumble and decay
But soon
They will know
One could grab them if not for the doubt
All the self loathing permeable
But lovers requiem loud and resounding
They are there to staunch the flow and heal the wounds
it’s all about the ones they never know
Trickling in and tearing flesh
Holding virtue to themselves
All will crumble and decay
But soon
They will know
#bipolar
#depression
#MentalHealth
149 reads
2 Comments
A dose of my childhood
Nostalgic and fair, faintly dreamy.
Reminding me of endless summer, warm and humid.
An uncomfortable feeling to be sure.
Yet memories still flood.
Never far from my mind.
Always faint but never fleeting.
Coffee and Cigarettes.
Dew before the sun had taken it.
Something akin to innocence though did we ever have any at all.
A dose of my childhood and here I stand.
Reminiscent and reminded.
Reminding me of endless summer, warm and humid.
An uncomfortable feeling to be sure.
Yet memories still flood.
Never far from my mind.
Always faint but never fleeting.
Coffee and Cigarettes.
Dew before the sun had taken it.
Something akin to innocence though did we ever have any at all.
A dose of my childhood and here I stand.
Reminiscent and reminded.
#anxiety
#depression
#memories
179 reads
3 Comments
Where to begin.
with the lack of understanding?
the subtle hints fallen flat
where are you?
you cant see, and I can't say.
the loop truly endless
how to speak up when my own courage falters.
I'll find you in all of this.
we will find our way.
the subtle hints fallen flat
where are you?
you cant see, and I can't say.
the loop truly endless
how to speak up when my own courage falters.
I'll find you in all of this.
we will find our way.
#love
#boyfriend
#lover
224 reads
1 Comment
Up and then down
Up and then down
The need for new the want for nothing.
The world is my oyster the darkness keeping me shelled.
My bed always calling, although I’m electric.
I wish it was as easy as one or the other, or neither and either.
But we’re rarely given the choice with mental health so we live and push forward.
Despite.
Up and then down.
The need for new the want for nothing.
The world is my oyster the darkness keeping me shelled.
My bed always calling, although I’m electric.
I wish it was as easy as one or the other, or neither and either.
But we’re rarely given the choice with mental health so we live and push forward.
Despite.
Up and then down.
#anxiety
#depression
#bipolar #MentalHealth
#bipolar #MentalHealth
262 reads
3 Comments
New Love
Fresh and new
From kisses to hugs
To laughs to songs
All of it fresh all of it new
Seen from a perspective all relative to you
The fear of vulnerability all too real
But when faced with the choice
I’m choosing you
No longer hiding
No longer in fear
From kisses to hugs
To laughs to songs
All of it fresh all of it new
Seen from a perspective all relative to you
The fear of vulnerability all too real
But when faced with the choice
I’m choosing you
No longer hiding
No longer in fear
#love
#boyfriend
767 reads
8 Comments
Fear in the Cold
Fear
Cold from the groin to the chest
Adrenaline shaking my bones
Sweat beading in every crevice
The circular thinking threatening to take control
If only I could take control
Then the shaking
The threat becoming real
I want it to end
I try to will an end
To take control
Cold from the groin to the chest
Adrenaline shaking my bones
Sweat beading in every crevice
The circular thinking threatening to take control
If only I could take control
Then the shaking
The threat becoming real
I want it to end
I try to will an end
To take control
#anxiety
#MentalHealth
386 reads
5 Comments
Watching you fall
Watching you fall
It’s more than enough
To never be you
And never enough to feel what I need.
Hearing and knowing it’s nothing but you slowly killing yourself,
Is more than enough
To never be you.
But never enough to understand why.
Knowing will always be enough.
But it will never ever be enough.
It’s more than enough
To never be you
And never enough to feel what I need.
Hearing and knowing it’s nothing but you slowly killing yourself,
Is more than enough
To never be you.
But never enough to understand why.
Knowing will always be enough.
But it will never ever be enough.
#depression
#family
#addiction #MentalHealth
#addiction #MentalHealth
317 reads
5 Comments
Cold Mornings
Cold mornings sat under the covers
The smell in the air reminding me of you.
The sounds lingering in the air a testament to the home you built.
Aroma of coffee as bitter sweet as the childhood memories.
Reminders all around but none nearly as strong as cold mornings under the covers.
The smell in the air reminding me of you.
The sounds lingering in the air a testament to the home you built.
Aroma of coffee as bitter sweet as the childhood memories.
Reminders all around but none nearly as strong as cold mornings under the covers.
#grief
#nostalgia
#bittersweet
318 reads
5 Comments
Untiltled
Be silent they said
It was how I was controlled
Being seen not heard
It was how I was controlled
Being seen not heard
#abuse
#PTSD
#manipulation
401 reads
6 Comments
Staying in the dark
Maybe if I stay here in the dark
I can avoid the true dark
Chanting to myself all the comfort I know
Louder in my head
Heavier in my chest
Wanting to come out of the “dark”
But not wanting to come out of the [dark]
Trying to find comfort trying to get up
There has to be a light somewhere.
I can avoid the true dark
Chanting to myself all the comfort I know
Louder in my head
Heavier in my chest
Wanting to come out of the “dark”
But not wanting to come out of the [dark]
Trying to find comfort trying to get up
There has to be a light somewhere.
#anxiety
#depression
#MentalHealth #apathy
#MentalHealth #apathy
415 reads
10 Comments
What does it mean to have lost you?
What does it mean to have lost you?
The question has swirled in my head since you’ve been gone.
But none of the answers have brought me any comfort or solace.
What does it mean to have lost you?
It means you are gone.
It means that I am here and it means….
That what’s left is all that you’ve left behind.
The truth, in the comfort of your passing
The thought that there is no pain, in truth brings more pain.
You’ve left broken more than you’d broke
And it’s a testament to the love that was a given.
But tell me please what does it...
The question has swirled in my head since you’ve been gone.
But none of the answers have brought me any comfort or solace.
What does it mean to have lost you?
It means you are gone.
It means that I am here and it means….
That what’s left is all that you’ve left behind.
The truth, in the comfort of your passing
The thought that there is no pain, in truth brings more pain.
You’ve left broken more than you’d broke
And it’s a testament to the love that was a given.
But tell me please what does it...
#grief
#death
300 reads
5 Comments
DU Poetry : Submissions by DaxterDux (Dax)
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