Submissions by B_xav_jay
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
Bandaids
Time
It comes and it goes
Something’s aren’t meant to last forever
What started off as I love you
Slowly turned to I hate you
Or maybe I hate myself
For loving you so much
You’ve torn me down and broken me
For that I should be grateful
Or so you remind me
I deserved it it’s all my fault
Or so you remind me
You stripped me of my pride
You stripped me of my dignity
And between the bruises
I love yous meant like bandaids
But they don’t band do they
And through it all
My...
It comes and it goes
Something’s aren’t meant to last forever
What started off as I love you
Slowly turned to I hate you
Or maybe I hate myself
For loving you so much
You’ve torn me down and broken me
For that I should be grateful
Or so you remind me
I deserved it it’s all my fault
Or so you remind me
You stripped me of my pride
You stripped me of my dignity
And between the bruises
I love yous meant like bandaids
But they don’t band do they
And through it all
My...
#DomesticViolence
#manipulation
#MovingOn
#sadness
#separation
99 reads
0 Comments
Define me
#bittersweet
#breakup
#jealousy
#manipulation
#MovingOn
60 reads
0 Comments
Who?
Who do you talk to
When nobody really listens
The voices in your head are screaming
You have so much on your mind
Even if they heard you they'd never understand
And let's face it
"I just wanna die"
Doesn't really start a conversation
And all you can manage is i'm fine
You crack a smile maybe even a few laughs
Put on your happy face and play it off for awhile
But when the weight of the world gets to be to much
Who do you talk to?
You've isolated yourself,
You have no friends
Because let's face it ...
When nobody really listens
The voices in your head are screaming
You have so much on your mind
Even if they heard you they'd never understand
And let's face it
"I just wanna die"
Doesn't really start a conversation
And all you can manage is i'm fine
You crack a smile maybe even a few laughs
Put on your happy face and play it off for awhile
But when the weight of the world gets to be to much
Who do you talk to?
You've isolated yourself,
You have no friends
Because let's face it ...
#anxiety
#ImSorry
#confusion
#FeelingLost
#emptiness
585 reads
1 Comment
Life: a Fate Worse then Death
It seems as though so often
we find ourselves in this place
Sometimes it’s dark
But even when it rains it’s beautiful
Or so they say
It’s crazy that agony and pain follow
Every night that I’m alone
Anxiety holds me hostage
& Depression has my soul
And now it seems life:
A fate worse then death
we find ourselves in this place
Sometimes it’s dark
But even when it rains it’s beautiful
Or so they say
It’s crazy that agony and pain follow
Every night that I’m alone
Anxiety holds me hostage
& Depression has my soul
And now it seems life:
A fate worse then death
#anxiety
#depression
#identity
#PTSD
#emptiness
361 reads
0 Comments
Over thinker
It’s true isn’t is
You’re slowly getting tired of me
I can see it in your eyes
They don’t light up when you hear my name anymore
You kiss me like it’s your job
I swear you touch me like it’s a habit
I don’t understand
What happened
What happened to the butterflies that used to come when we touched
I still get them
But if you don’t it’s okay to tell me
I cry when you roll over in your sleep
You didn’t know that did you
You didn’t think such a little loss of touch could hurt me
Well it...
You’re slowly getting tired of me
I can see it in your eyes
They don’t light up when you hear my name anymore
You kiss me like it’s your job
I swear you touch me like it’s a habit
I don’t understand
What happened
What happened to the butterflies that used to come when we touched
I still get them
But if you don’t it’s okay to tell me
I cry when you roll over in your sleep
You didn’t know that did you
You didn’t think such a little loss of touch could hurt me
Well it...
#strength
#dark
#patience
#honesty
#misunderstood
585 reads
1 Comment
A time
Memories, they come and go;
slowing you down through passing time, paining you.
Emotions flood through you.
Anger boils up, sadness overcomes;
The memories engulf you.
They close up your mind, forcing you to think of the time,
the time that you cannot change; the time you wish you could.
Yet the memories haunt you.
They scream about the day, the time, the hour, the minute, even the second that seems to freeze.
Replaying in your mind, hurting you every time.
Anxiety rushing through...
slowing you down through passing time, paining you.
Emotions flood through you.
Anger boils up, sadness overcomes;
The memories engulf you.
They close up your mind, forcing you to think of the time,
the time that you cannot change; the time you wish you could.
Yet the memories haunt you.
They scream about the day, the time, the hour, the minute, even the second that seems to freeze.
Replaying in your mind, hurting you every time.
Anxiety rushing through...
#myself
601 reads
0 Comments
The wall
Who are you
To think you have so much power
To break me down like you did
If only I was Stronger
Maybe just maybe
I could have held you off
To carry this with me
To drain me of my light
You've crossed the line
Unfortunately so many times
So many times I screamed
No one came
Alone with you I was
Scared for so long
The boundaries you broke
Honestly May Never Mend
Scared you may come again
To hold me down
A solid weight on my chest
As i scream no
Boundaries Not Meant to Break
But somehow ...
To think you have so much power
To break me down like you did
If only I was Stronger
Maybe just maybe
I could have held you off
To carry this with me
To drain me of my light
You've crossed the line
Unfortunately so many times
So many times I screamed
No one came
Alone with you I was
Scared for so long
The boundaries you broke
Honestly May Never Mend
Scared you may come again
To hold me down
A solid weight on my chest
As i scream no
Boundaries Not Meant to Break
But somehow ...
#PopCulture
618 reads
0 Comments
Resurface
My mother,
in her most vulnerable state
The addiction runs deep in her veins
The burn of the booze as it goes down
She hurts
She pays the price for her daughter's trauma
She can't seem to catch a break
She raised this family;
Yet she can't seem to understand,
Why I can't talk about it
But I must not; could not
She would die
Not litterally
But her heart would break
Her soul would shatter
She can't know the pain that I suffered
I sheild her from the terrors
The terrors that still...
in her most vulnerable state
The addiction runs deep in her veins
The burn of the booze as it goes down
She hurts
She pays the price for her daughter's trauma
She can't seem to catch a break
She raised this family;
Yet she can't seem to understand,
Why I can't talk about it
But I must not; could not
She would die
Not litterally
But her heart would break
Her soul would shatter
She can't know the pain that I suffered
I sheild her from the terrors
The terrors that still...
553 reads
1 Comment
Sheets of Solitude
So cold and empty, these sheets feel
An oasis of abandonment
Sheets of isolation and solitude
Five pillows for two
But wait where are you
Alone I feel;
Every night you're not here
Tears flood my eyes
My bed, feels five hundred miles wide
I don't know what to do
I just smother my face, in clothes that smell like you
I miss you;
The way your lips taste;
That smell lingering off your skin;
The way you hold me; make me feel safe
But then horror hits
I'm all alone, in this bed fit for two ...
An oasis of abandonment
Sheets of isolation and solitude
Five pillows for two
But wait where are you
Alone I feel;
Every night you're not here
Tears flood my eyes
My bed, feels five hundred miles wide
I don't know what to do
I just smother my face, in clothes that smell like you
I miss you;
The way your lips taste;
That smell lingering off your skin;
The way you hold me; make me feel safe
But then horror hits
I'm all alone, in this bed fit for two ...
521 reads
0 Comments
Broken
I can't breathe
This room feels so diminutive
My lungs might collapse
This lack of sleep is exceeding
I feel fainter by the day
What is love; clearly pain
I wish I could say you get what you give
But with you that's not the case
You drain me
You pain me
You consume me in your lies
"I miss you"
"I love you"
How the fuck could you lie
I'm angry
I'm upset
I'm so tired of feeling alone
Where were you when I needed you the most
You're never here when I feel alone
You must not really see it
I'm...
This room feels so diminutive
My lungs might collapse
This lack of sleep is exceeding
I feel fainter by the day
What is love; clearly pain
I wish I could say you get what you give
But with you that's not the case
You drain me
You pain me
You consume me in your lies
"I miss you"
"I love you"
How the fuck could you lie
I'm angry
I'm upset
I'm so tired of feeling alone
Where were you when I needed you the most
You're never here when I feel alone
You must not really see it
I'm...
683 reads
1 Comment
Gone...
What do you do when you don't know anymore
You don't know who he is; you don't know where he's gone
He's been gone for a while now, but he was supposed to always stay
Always keep you safe
But he's gone now, but I could have sworn he promised to never leave
But I guess our relationships just full of broken dreams
It used to be just you and him
Daddy's little girl
Bumpin 97' Bonnie & Clyde
Thinking it'd never end
But he's gone now
You're all alone; what you gunna do?
Daddy's...
You don't know who he is; you don't know where he's gone
He's been gone for a while now, but he was supposed to always stay
Always keep you safe
But he's gone now, but I could have sworn he promised to never leave
But I guess our relationships just full of broken dreams
It used to be just you and him
Daddy's little girl
Bumpin 97' Bonnie & Clyde
Thinking it'd never end
But he's gone now
You're all alone; what you gunna do?
Daddy's...
617 reads
1 Comment
Dark Days
As the long dark days whisk away I miss you
It seems as all days are dark
And you're the bright light that coruscates it all away
My chevalier; my man-at-arms
My lover; my protector
You keep me impervious from the dark
When my world is crashing down; you save me from myself
From all the aching of my bleeding heart
From all the agonizing pain the dark days bring
Unfortunately it never ends
An ending cycle, of all the memories
They haunt me in the dark
Like a child in fear of the monsters that lie under the bed; ...
It seems as all days are dark
And you're the bright light that coruscates it all away
My chevalier; my man-at-arms
My lover; my protector
You keep me impervious from the dark
When my world is crashing down; you save me from myself
From all the aching of my bleeding heart
From all the agonizing pain the dark days bring
Unfortunately it never ends
An ending cycle, of all the memories
They haunt me in the dark
Like a child in fear of the monsters that lie under the bed; ...
702 reads
2 Comments
DU Poetry : Submissions by B_xav_jay
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