Someone you have wronged

“Oldest Saddest Son”
http://cdn.sheknows.com/articles/2011/11/Sleeping-baby.jpg

Not really sure what I’ve done to you all these years, but
you’ve been pissed at me my whole life.
No matter what I did, you always put me down,
the frown that you wore spoke volumes.

Though, I tried and tried and tried,
sometimes acted like a clown
(just to make you smile),
I was never good enough,
could never please you.
I  wish you could understand
how I feel, I didn’t
choose my predicament-
you did, along with Dad.
I thought babies made people happy!
So it’s really sad, he’s not here to
hear my apology.

For what it’s worth Mother,
I’m sorry for everything I ever did.
Other than being born, I’m not
really sure what else
I could have possibly done.
Did I make you feel unworthy,
take away your sun, or
steal all your fun?
Please tell me.

Signed,  
Your Oldest
Saddest Son

Anonymous said:<< post removed >>

You're welcome Broomie...Strider :)

Apology To Self


......And I allowed myself to be downtrodden
self worth lost in the shadows of yesterday
the thread of me slowly unravelled
at the hands of someone else's will

 
I am sorry
.....to myself


For the blows to my confidence
that I so freely accepted
upon my emotionless expression
at the time when my mind was in turmoil


And when I loathe what my reflection brings
I have too close my eyes to hide


And I am sorry
.....to myself


because I allowed another to control
my choices
my dreams
my life


where I was slowly dying inside


For every scar that I wear
in cryptic stories
blood being the ink that wept


For holding the feelings of being
insignificant
worthless
and never good enough
in the palm of my hands
like gifts that I was showered with


I apologise to myself
for making those choices and
allowing someone else to make me feel that way

Loved this poem...very true to emotions felt my own self...can't say I would of been as eloquent.

Mother, it's come down to just survival

I'm sorry that your dreams
of a daughter withered
in your belly
almost 35 years before
I was even a thought

I'm sure there's
a part of you is sated
by my general happiness
but there's no mistaking
the doubt and disappointment
cracking your eyes
and splitting your mouth

you've got two prodigal sons
that birthed two angelic daughters

and for me-
the bad seed
it's come down to just survival

Anonymous said:<< post removed >>

No problem Broom.  I'm digging the cat photo by the way.  Makes me smile every time I happen by it.

::Shine & Example::


http://8020.photos.jpgmag.com/3218759_270282_9ccb289f42_l.jpg


an explosion
the end of a life, the exploding
the fire, some ash, always the ash
much dirt, often dirt, often holes
alotta holes; too many

whole holes for one’s true self to fall through
in finality, in death its what we do
I’m so sorry

sorry is a kiss for you who’s missed
sorry for your family who’ve lived the risk
sorry, is the hoped for
that entitled bliss

sorry, then sorry there’s another curse
sorry, another sorry and then the hearse
perhaps later on some recited verse
so drunk, sorry saying we didn’t rehearse

again I’m so sorry about the holes
about the fire and how it rolls
about the dirt, about the ash
how it all had sprung from the fire’s flash

again, sorry that

there should’ve never been an explosion
again, sorry about our bond and its careless erosion

I’m sorry for these visiting storms; this
our modern lives and their tragic norms
sorry about the repetitive
so sorry that I’m needing a sedative
and I’ll be sorry for these times that you didn’t live
for I’ll be sorry that it was your life that you had to give

and so sorry for your wake at this god-awful pub
and sorry for our friends
who’ll be missing their hub




...
photo: joshua levy






.

to my cat:

i'm sorry i did not hold you
in your cancer
seizure
fearpainlove
you did love me

i'm sorry i did not hold you
in you euthanasia end
betterthisway
no more
medicine
pain seizure love
i did love you

i suppose i will forget
how much i loved you

i would clean up an acre of your diarrhea

but all i give you is a shit eulogy
and a meaningless sorry
because lovelovelove
my solace from this shit world
was only you

i'm sorry i had to make it
into bad poetry

Some Kind Of Release~


I can be kind of selfish, that I wont deny,

Forgive anything that I've done to make you wanna cry.

I dont know why some of those things I felt I had to do,

I never meant to hand out Tears, especially to you.

Sometimes I do these things that I dont understand,

Wearily I hang my head and say "I'm Not A man".

I'm just a lost soul lookin for some kind of release,

Running through my own waged War in hope for future Peace.

Dont take me too serious, cause serious I'm not,

Life is too damn short to act like Time is all we've got.

I'm a fuckin freak, a fuckin weird-o, too,

But least I'm real and what I am is proud that I stayed true.

I know what I am and thats how I am Me,

I never saw a reason to hide the inner beast.

I can be an asshole, That I wont deny,

But everybody has their days and sometimes I have mine.

I never claimed perfection, I have too many flaws,

Perfection's for those who believe In God and Santa Clause.

Somehow I found you, though, in all the fading lights,

And suddenly the world slowed down and everything felt right.

I took that for granted, and now I realize,

The only place I feel alive is there inside your eyes.

I dont know my feelings, is this Love that I feel?

Nothing that I've seen so far can prove it's even real.

Sometimes I can be distant, far beyond the sky,

That's because I'm silently asking the Stars why:

Why they always bring me love that just fades away;

Why everything I do only digs more of my grave;

Why everything I ask for comes with overcast;

Why everyone that comes my way leaves way too damn fast.

And then, sometimes, I'm there with you lost inside the way,

The way you have me so caught up in the things you say;

The way youcatch me looking and give that lovely smile;

The way you take the world away and make this life less vile;

The way you hold me close and tell me everything that's wrong;

The way you kiss my lips and tell me it wont be too long;

The way you fall asleep and stay right next to me,

As I lay there wide awake, wondering if you're MY Dream.

And sometimes I'm this foolish fool, hopeless in my ways,

Ever asking all the Stars to bring you back to stay.