Story Poems Seeking Honest Critique
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
Poetry about Dreams, Fantasy and Fiction
Honest critique has been requested for these poems. Want to learn the art of critique? Join our Honestly Crafted Critique group.
If at first you don't succeed, hide in the garden shed
A man from America convinced himself that he was dying of a transmissible disease and that he had already infected his wife & children. To spare himself and his family this terrible fate, he decided they should all die.
In the middle of his homemade crime spree, he called the police to notify them of the murder suicide in progress. He murdered each family member with a fatal gunshot to the head.
While waiting for the cops to arrive, he stabbed himself repeatedly, but found that he wasn't dying quickly enough. He then decided to hit himself over the head with a...
In the middle of his homemade crime spree, he called the police to notify them of the murder suicide in progress. He murdered each family member with a fatal gunshot to the head.
While waiting for the cops to arrive, he stabbed himself repeatedly, but found that he wasn't dying quickly enough. He then decided to hit himself over the head with a...
#family
#murder
#suicide
#fiction
#ignorance
31 reads
8 Comments
Theo explains his history
#lust
#erotic
#BDSM #vampires
#BDSM #vampires
14 reads
2 Comments
Twitch of the Death Nerve
#loneliness
#women
#violence
#fiction
#MentalHealth
23 reads
10 Comments
War is Hell, Hell is War!
In the grip of winter
Impending dread
The opposing army seized their home
Family fought them hard and with honor
Critical madness
All of his family slaughtered
Disemboweled
Stillborn removed
Torched
Charred remains
He was the last survivor
Barely endured the massacre
Ridden with disease
Severed survival
Gasping for air
On life support
A vacant coffin awaits
Retribution for the dead
Impending dread
The opposing army seized their home
Family fought them hard and with honor
Critical madness
All of his family slaughtered
Disemboweled
Stillborn removed
Torched
Charred remains
He was the last survivor
Barely endured the massacre
Ridden with disease
Severed survival
Gasping for air
On life support
A vacant coffin awaits
Retribution for the dead
#dark
#violence
#war
#death
#revenge
49 reads
5 Comments
The Meek Are Ready.
She plugged her ears and moved swiftly through the trees.
She thought of the sounds that crickets make
anything to drown out the screams.
Fear began whispering inside of her head.
She wanted to go back but she knew even if
they're alive now in a few moments they'd all
be dead.
Booms, bangs, cries, and shrieks they
should've ran with her instead they called her
a Jesus freak.
She thought of the sounds that crickets make
anything to drown out the screams.
Fear began whispering inside of her head.
She wanted to go back but she knew even if
they're alive now in a few moments they'd all
be dead.
Booms, bangs, cries, and shrieks they
should've ran with her instead they called her
a Jesus freak.
#trees
#unicorns
62 reads
5 Comments
Next Steps to Growth.
Next steps to growth.
Constance came back from her excursion having found another two Vampires that would need accommodating for a daily feed when they finished the completion phase.
She had already called Ryan to use Penny until we could find another donor to assist with our growing tribe.
She had already got them to agree that coming to the mansion for a short while would be preferable, as while we had space, there was a concern that they lived within a couple of miles of a vampire hunter and leaving them with no support would not be anything more than a...
Constance came back from her excursion having found another two Vampires that would need accommodating for a daily feed when they finished the completion phase.
She had already called Ryan to use Penny until we could find another donor to assist with our growing tribe.
She had already got them to agree that coming to the mansion for a short while would be preferable, as while we had space, there was a concern that they lived within a couple of miles of a vampire hunter and leaving them with no support would not be anything more than a...
#BDSM
#vampires
#learning
52 reads
4 Comments
Red
You weren't the one I was looking for
But now I don't wanna look away
You feel like a safe space
I always want to stay
I see the sparks fly and the smoke burn
Our red string of fate
Pulls me close everytime I try to run
Red is the colour of our love
Stream that flows inside of us
Has now come out as blood
The sparks and smoke have flown across
Spreading the name of our love
Everyone looking our way
But I am not anxious as you stay the same
You stand strong but I can feel ...
But now I don't wanna look away
You feel like a safe space
I always want to stay
I see the sparks fly and the smoke burn
Our red string of fate
Pulls me close everytime I try to run
Red is the colour of our love
Stream that flows inside of us
Has now come out as blood
The sparks and smoke have flown across
Spreading the name of our love
Everyone looking our way
But I am not anxious as you stay the same
You stand strong but I can feel ...
#love
60 reads
0 Comments
A Girl With the Skin of the Moon
I met a young girl with a face of a leper,
as I browsed some travel books at the local store down on the lower east side
I heard her mother was raped on a bed of sand, while watching two people fuck on a bed of sand
she was known as a pillow biter
her bruises were covered with makeup
she wanted revenge
someone took a photograph of the rape
one of the men was in the lower left of the photograph
she described the rape as a porno holocaust
it was a gang bang
one of the men were discovered in a steam bath
this wasn't his first time
he...
as I browsed some travel books at the local store down on the lower east side
I heard her mother was raped on a bed of sand, while watching two people fuck on a bed of sand
she was known as a pillow biter
her bruises were covered with makeup
she wanted revenge
someone took a photograph of the rape
one of the men was in the lower left of the photograph
she described the rape as a porno holocaust
it was a gang bang
one of the men were discovered in a steam bath
this wasn't his first time
he...
#violence
#abuse
#fiction
#ShortStory
#illness
55 reads
2 Comments
Play With Fire....You know the rest
A 38 year old woman in America doused herself in gasoline and lit herself on fire in protest of one of those yearly Miss America Beauty Pageant's. Before lighting the match, the woman shouted slogans criticizing the pageant's exploitation of woman. Her last words were reportedly, "WATER! WATER! WATER!!"
#fire
#fiction
#ShortStory #support
#ShortStory #support
55 reads
2 Comments
Cosmic Beings
I saw today aliens wearing bad toupee's
they were having a foursome on the beach
I just watched
The waves were meh, so I just stared
One of the aliens was butt fucking the other alien,
came real fast and decided to go to the snack bar
I asked him where were they were from, he said, "Way past Uranus"!
I think he was kidding but then again, maybe he was insulting me
I saw him order turtle soup and a drink called yellow passion
Not sure what that was except,
when I ordered one, it tasted like piss
Actually it was piss!! ...
they were having a foursome on the beach
I just watched
The waves were meh, so I just stared
One of the aliens was butt fucking the other alien,
came real fast and decided to go to the snack bar
I asked him where were they were from, he said, "Way past Uranus"!
I think he was kidding but then again, maybe he was insulting me
I saw him order turtle soup and a drink called yellow passion
Not sure what that was except,
when I ordered one, it tasted like piss
Actually it was piss!! ...
#sex
#drugs
#fiction
#aliens
#scifi
71 reads
10 Comments
Plan for the future - part two
#lust
#BDSM
#vampires
#hurt
#Romanticism
37 reads
6 Comments
The blue alien
The blue alien
If ever there was an alien form
Blue jellyfish sailing around in swarms
They floated from down on parachutes
Millions of years hence to land in the gloop
Founding, a habitat
In the muddy dark morass
They held a secret long unknown
The envy of all living forms
The gift of perpetuity
to clone, gain longevity
retrace the steps from death to birth
reproduce, and then disperse
transparency so complex
Medusa a Gorgon an unearthly flesh
Just aliens waiting with just one swish
Holding the grail to...
If ever there was an alien form
Blue jellyfish sailing around in swarms
They floated from down on parachutes
Millions of years hence to land in the gloop
Founding, a habitat
In the muddy dark morass
They held a secret long unknown
The envy of all living forms
The gift of perpetuity
to clone, gain longevity
retrace the steps from death to birth
reproduce, and then disperse
transparency so complex
Medusa a Gorgon an unearthly flesh
Just aliens waiting with just one swish
Holding the grail to...
#scifi
34 reads
0 Comments
DU Poetry : Story Poems Seeking Critique about Dreams, Fantasy and Fiction