Falling

People talk about falling: falling in love, falling into harmony, falling into the arms of another. As if falling is a graceful act that only happens once, but when you get back up you fall once more. Over and over and over again they mention falling and falling hard. But do they mention tripping? Stumbling, jumping, dancing, fainting and even flipping! Because doing something with so much effort doesn’t happen as if everything is working to pull you down into the work you didn’t know you had. Nothing glides through the air with so much grace that the world seems to stop, just for you. It especially doesn’t happen when your eyes meet and for a second you think life could go on for centuries while you look into his eyes and you wouldn’t even know it. Because it’s not falling, its stepping. Stepping closer and closer to the edge of where your life and theirs collide and instead of falling into one another you step again. Step by step you figure out their favorite color and even their favorite toothpaste brand but it’s never falling. You trip and stumble and even run into a few things while taking either long or short strides. And when you hear other people talk about your relationship and hear, “They fell in love.” Do you think they mean where I entrusted my life in the limbs of another and prayed to each god there was, hoping he would catch me? Or we jumped off the edge of a volcano erupting passion, lust, and broken hearts so we could melt our flesh together; burn our bodies so we become one with the rest of those who jumped so the next couple, whoever they be, can experience what it is like to stumble upon a connection that can make them jump for joy because the heat radiating off two bodies wrapped around one another in the middle of the night can cause an addiction that turns stumbling into crawling. Fall: move downward, typically rapidly and freely without control, from a higher to a lower level. So by falling you mean we grew a connection and a relationship that was chaotic and too fast. Or is it the action instead of the metaphor? Chaotically and rapidly getting into something which may or may not be a mistake, but what if it’s all about getting back up again? The strain of your muscles as they compress because they haven’t felt a blow like that before. The popping of knuckles and only getting to the bent knees position because maybe that “fall” was harder than intended; finally reaching and getting to your feet so you can regain proper nerves. That feeling, that ache, that passion, that love makes you feel like falling was worth it. But not all people are the same. Not all things that fall get back up again.