deepundergroundpoetry.com
Hopes and Dreams
As the past dwells upon me, I think to myself.
About what I have done to everyone else.
I've made their hearts hurt and gave them beliefs.
I make myself give up and caused them all griefs.
I know I'm a bad excuse for a person.
I just face the facts and then I move on.
Who knows the way to fix the mistakes?
I think that there's no way, its just what you make.
Live life to the fullest, the best way you can.
Not everyone is perfect, just know where you stand.
We all make mistakes just know your limit.
Whatever you make of it is what you will get.
It just goes to show, its not all what it seems.
We just have our hopes and all of our dreams.
About what I have done to everyone else.
I've made their hearts hurt and gave them beliefs.
I make myself give up and caused them all griefs.
I know I'm a bad excuse for a person.
I just face the facts and then I move on.
Who knows the way to fix the mistakes?
I think that there's no way, its just what you make.
Live life to the fullest, the best way you can.
Not everyone is perfect, just know where you stand.
We all make mistakes just know your limit.
Whatever you make of it is what you will get.
It just goes to show, its not all what it seems.
We just have our hopes and all of our dreams.
Published 28th Sep 2010
| Edited 16th Oct 2010
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The author encourages honest critique.
I feel there is a good basis for a poem but it needs a little work. I think maybe you should take griefs out of the 4th line, it's a made up word, and have a rethink about choice of vocabulary, try and think of words that will add more depth.
Lascivious
Lascivious
