Life Resumes

It comes bewildering, scary
Snatching my breath
Tearing apart fairytale facades
Disrupting hard fought safety
Suddenly knowing and doing are not the same
Laying questions before me
What l want to be and what l am. Poles apart
Their Lables making it all too hard
What am l?
Can l choose?
Good and not me
Bad and doomed
But here it is...demanding and insistent
Too loud to be ignored
Longing snaking through my day
Stupid or brave
I leap out
A small delightful death and...
Now the fall begins
Is this excitement or terror
Freedom or captivity