Come Back Later

You’re probably the woman I’ve been trying to avoid the most to no avail of any kind
No matter how hard I try you pry through my mental strength
Eye for an eye…and a voice…for a voice…
The crazy thing is that you actually destroy me and you probably don’t even know it…
I’m speaking to you and you only…
This isn’t just another piece of a piece of me writing a piece about some woman
Who means something to me…no…
I’m here to confront you…Mom…
Yea you heard what I said and you read me correctly
You can’t expect me not to panic and fret and get schizophrenic every single time my
Emotions die and I’m in need of a motherly medic
And you can’t be there to patch my wounds and
Seal my cuts and
Sew back my open slashes and gashes rooting from your ashes
Inspired by my asshole of a past, haunting my present and making hard my future
Im not here blaming you for my pain and rain on sunny days
But sometimes…you simply need to go…
Away from me…out of my mind until I can get done what I need to get done
So I can so I can close, kill, conquer and conclude
Anything causing me the struggle I live today
Ill never forget you, Ill never leave you and Ill never deceive you
I’m taking care of myself simply because you didn’t when you needed to most
That is exactly what you taught me not to do by doing
And thatz something I will forever be disappointed in you for
Itz taken all of my courage to write this
And all of my might to live this
And as my hands are shaking my mind is raking all of my emotional leaves
But a tornado of new ones are sure to come and sweep the already disheveled land
That is my mind and scramble them all over again
You are what strengthens and dismantles me
My organization and my disarray
The cuts on my heart and what keeps it beating
The reason I’m sane and the cause of my insanity
Seriously Ma? Pick a side!! I’m tired of having these mental clips of horror movies of you
That you’ve created through your pain
You’ve been the director of my life for a while and now its time for me
To finish this flick where you left off
And create a happy ending rather than one to regret
And your stationary bones may position me prone
But I will always rise again…

By BLacc Zacc