deepundergroundpoetry.com
Paul's hey-day
Ol' Paul's hey-day
Life was so swell
Though sadly, all was not well
When chased by the drug-squad
Fleeing like a startled gazelle
With amazing agility
He had such ability.
His emotions feeling rather unwell
When "pimped" by his best pal, he thought:
"What the hell!"
Lately his life's much more peaceful
No more taking drugs by the shovelful.
Life was so swell
Though sadly, all was not well
When chased by the drug-squad
Fleeing like a startled gazelle
With amazing agility
He had such ability.
His emotions feeling rather unwell
When "pimped" by his best pal, he thought:
"What the hell!"
Lately his life's much more peaceful
No more taking drugs by the shovelful.
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Re: Paul's hey-day
11th Jan 2013 11:51am
Re: Paul's hey-day
11th Jan 2013 1:59pm
Re: Paul's hey-day
30th Jan 2013 3:26pm
Sorry for taking so long. I live in the semi-desert without internet!
Thanks Shaunda and BDOT for the comments! I can see you are both quite serious and busy poets!
Thanks Shaunda and BDOT for the comments! I can see you are both quite serious and busy poets!
re: Re: Paul's hey-day
20th Feb 2013 00:30am
Re: Paul's hey-day
2nd May 2013 2:07pm
re: Re: Paul's hey-day
3rd May 2013 7:01pm
Re: Paul's hey-day
8th May 2013 3:36pm
The poem makes it seem like Paul is still taking drugs, just "not by the shovelful." Is that correct? You display deep empathy in this poem, and you have a fine ability to rhyme. A couple rhymes seem a bit forced, though, like "rather unwell." You are a talented poet. Thank you for sharing this with me. Please (Oh, please) keep on penning, poet friend.
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re: Re: Paul's hey-day
22nd May 2013 12:52pm
ag I only do it for fun and do not take myself serious. Old Paul stopped mandrax and LSD over 3 decades ago. he only smokes the green leaf once in a while. He is one of the greatest poets around but faded into total obscurity.i thank youfor your positive critisism.
Re: Paul's hey-day
10th May 2013 7:14am
Ah, what joy!
Thank you for this wonderful response.
Agree with the comment of forced rhyme - must improve.
You are so kind, thanks again.
Thank you for this wonderful response.
Agree with the comment of forced rhyme - must improve.
You are so kind, thanks again.