In a Blink

There was regret spewed across the marble floor  
It reeked of sorrow lilies and forgotten morality  
My head hung limply  
In the remains of a foul lover  
Lying in a third of aged brandy  
 
I was the embodiment of self pity and animosity  
With a smile stitched across my face  
For I had become nameless  
Soiled and grateful  
I saw a withered rose  
In my peripheral  
Was overwhelmed with nostalgia  
Then I blinked...  
 
The darkness consumed me  
I could feel it gnawing at my lungs  
Thieving for my very essence  
And in the distance I heard remorse  
Listening to the weeping of an angels opera  
Guiding me to that place beyond the cathedral
The one I had discovered in myself
 
Alone..  
 
Shivering in the sight of a god that I had failed  
One that had failed me  
 
I was bruised  
On my knees  
Bleeding from my eyes  
As the need for forgiveness was languid... nonexistant  
I would live godless
Lawless
for I would never be tangible  
Never had been  
.
.

That's when he came to me  
Dressed in black  
Adorned in silk and a befitting top hat  
Whispering secret syllables  
That I was his
The walls caught aflame  
And he outstretched his porcelain fingers  
I needed them to caress me  
To devour me..  
 
Yet I refused..  
 
And just like that  
It was over..  
 
In that one vision  
That one soul wrenching instant  
I found realization  
That I..  
 
 
 
I..  
 
 
 
Well..  
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
I was nothing