deepundergroundpoetry.com
Heartless One
Shamelessly they follow him with pride
Some had wished to only try
To say the name of the one that scent
Only to find they could not repent
To see the world that is pitch black
The broken hearted could not come back
The chaos seems to open doors
Dreams shatter like glass across the floor
In the ruin is not a pleasant dream
Their souls are lost they only scream
The unholy hour is close at hand
To take the life of every man
Heartless one enters the scene
In your darkest fears it would seem
The hopeless ones shake and shiver
The raven’s calls make them quiver
the shutters rattle on the windows once more
but they lay lifeless so they are no more
so to the Heartless one without a voice
they held you from having a choice
to from living your life the way you wanted to be
shooting yourself to find your peace
Some had wished to only try
To say the name of the one that scent
Only to find they could not repent
To see the world that is pitch black
The broken hearted could not come back
The chaos seems to open doors
Dreams shatter like glass across the floor
In the ruin is not a pleasant dream
Their souls are lost they only scream
The unholy hour is close at hand
To take the life of every man
Heartless one enters the scene
In your darkest fears it would seem
The hopeless ones shake and shiver
The raven’s calls make them quiver
the shutters rattle on the windows once more
but they lay lifeless so they are no more
so to the Heartless one without a voice
they held you from having a choice
to from living your life the way you wanted to be
shooting yourself to find your peace
Published 14th Nov 2012
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comments 6
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The author encourages honest critique.
14th Nov 2012 5:10pm
I like the cadence of this piece. The wording of the story/poem is appealing too. Good job!
12th Dec 2012 11:28pm
19th Dec 2012 11:59pm
20th Dec 2012 9:25pm
17th Jan 2013 8:53pm
This poem is written quite well. I love this part "The unholy hour is close at hand
To take the life of every man"
I'd recommend taking "to or from" out of this line "to from living your life the way you wanted to be" It doesn't make sense having them both in there. Aside from that this poem has an excellent rhythm. Nice work
To take the life of every man"
I'd recommend taking "to or from" out of this line "to from living your life the way you wanted to be" It doesn't make sense having them both in there. Aside from that this poem has an excellent rhythm. Nice work
19th Jan 2013 10:24pm
