who i was

they're waiting on me
to take the first step
and they're waiting on me
to take my last breath
so that i can die
and never come back
let alone fix the world
get rid of all these putrid things
so when i die
they'll celebrate on my grave
they're waiting on me
to throw away my cigarrate
and they're waiting for me
to fall to the ground
and give up
let myself drown
in this sea of pain
and i feel alone
agaisnt the world
no one beside me
except my lonely shadow
its up to me to live my life
cant let no one take control
its my road
my book that i'm writting in
so get the fuck off
and leave me in peace
while i carve this story
into my fragile mind
you dont undestand
why i wont let you in
you took this mind
rammed straight to the ground
erased all trace
of sanity in me
took away my soul
cut it in two
took my heart
broke it into pieces
so i'm left here in this cold world
with nothing to do
except mourn for the boy
that used to live in my body
he died and left the world
oh such a shame
he was full of life and joy
prayed for the world
now i realize i miss him
in all his glory
he could never live here
now he's gone
and i cant do anything about it
so i use these words
to remember the boy
that i used to be
remember the times
when he used to be the good one
but i have to let go
cant keep on reminiscing on the past
learn from my mistakes
and keep on pushing through
but i still remember
who i used to be