patience

"impatience is futile"
i tell myself
but it doesn’t help
they say waiting builds character
i hate things that build character
and i hate waiting
"patience, little one," He tells me
as if those magic words
will make it easier
will calm my twitching
my tapping foot
my drumming fingers
trying to dispel nervous energy
building inside me
while forced by circumstances
to simply wait
“learn to be still”
i remind myself
imagining His voice speaking the words
a comforting thought
but it’s to no avail
as my foot continues to bounce
as my fingers play a soundless tune
on the tabletop
"soon, little one," He tells me
i wonder how soon
i wonder how much character I can build