Tonight

It's awful, this feeling.
Alone to weep while
they dance and meet
with God.


Well stay where you
are then! Hide inside
your home without
having had bathed
and hair disheveled,
and stench repulsive.

You pull me, tearing
me away from myself
to embrace me. I'm
stiff now because you're
different and unhappy
and you don't ever care
but for yourself.

I despise the baby voice
you make and face to match
when you don't get your way.
You're an adult now, not a
tear-streaked, sticky-handed
child!

You were perfect once, you
went to heaven's apartments
every week with me. Now you
are as I feel: empty.