My Permanent Resident Evil

I once was a little girl with hope, admiration and passion for life.
I visualized my happiness in my mind using my heart as a guide.
But then one day, those feelings had changed, little by little I started to crash. All these new feelings made me want to smash, your head in the ground deep only in thought. You decided you were gonna live as long as you could, with me wishing you dead for as long as I've known.
You did something once that lasted a day, but that day brought on anger that I knew would just stay.
It's a permanent part of my soul, this feeling of rage.
I have to let it out somehow, but i'll be put in a cage.
It's not fair that you deny that day you hurt me,
that started this anger and investment in me.
I have lost who I am now, and have lost much love too, because of this thing that no father should do.
You changed something in me, and made it so hard for me to be happy, healthy and large.
I need so much love to shield me my pain, but I cant seem to ever do the same, to even someone who thinks I'm the best, phenomenal woman...Hmph I dont pass that test.