WHAT THAT DAY WILL LEAVE ME WITH

I REMEMBER THAT DAY, I REMEMBER THE DAY THEY SAID SHE DIDN’T HAVE MUCH TIME LEFT
I REMEMBER THE DAY SHE TOLD ME SHE DIDN’T HAVE ENOUGH TIME LEFT TO THINK ABOUT THE ONES THAT HAVE HURT HER SO BADLY IN LIFE
BUT HER THOUGHTS I KNEW, HER THOUGHTS WOULD BE THE ONLY THING SHE WOULD HAVE TO LIVE WITH
AND SHE WOULD BE LIVING WITH THESE THOUGHTS UNTIL THE DAY ARRIVED THAT SHE WOULD BE LEAVING.
SHE WOULD BE LEAVING US ALL BEHIND, AND I WOULD BE LEFT WITH THESE THOGUHTS THEY SCATTER LIKE BEADS DROPPED TO THE GROUND
MY DOUBT WAKENS, MY FAITH SHATTERS
IM LEFT WITH BEING LEFT LIKE NOTHING ELSE MATTERS.
IT DOESN’T MATTER THAT I WAS THERE THE DAY THEY TOLD HER SHE OUGHT TO CONSIDER STARTING THE REAPERS WORK AND HE STRETCHES OUT CLOSER AND CLOSER IN THE DARK OF NIGHT.
I CHECK UP ON HER BUT ITS NO USE WHEN IT IS HER TIME IT IS HER TIME. WHEN IT IS HER TIME HE WILL TAKE HER AWAY, NO MERCY TO TOUCH EVERYTHING SHE WILL BE TAKING WITH HER WHEN SHE LEAVES.
IT WILL NOT DRY ONE TEAR I WILL SHED WHEN I GRIEVE. I WILL GRIEVE BECAUSE I WILL BE LEFT BEHIND IN A WORLD SHE NO LONGER ROAMS, I WILL BE A STRAY BECAUSE I WILL NOT HAVE A HOME.
I WILL NOT HAVE A HOME BECAUSE I WILL NOT HAVE her TO WARM MY HEART, MY HANDS WILL BE COLD, MY HANDS WILL REMAIN SO COLD COMPLELETY BECAUSE I’LL HOLD HERS TIGHT UNTIL SHE SLIPS AWAY FOREVER.
EACH DAY THE SUN RISES, I SEE THE LIGHT DYING DOWN IN HER EYES WEAKER AND WEAKER SHE GROWS LIKE A BRANCH IN THE FLAME UNTIL IT SNAPS AND ITS DESTRYOED FORVER. LOST IN THE CLOUD OF SMOKE, TORCHED UNTIL THERE IS NOTHING LEFT ANY MORE, JUST THE ASHES OF SOMETHING THAT HUNG IN THERE, SHE’LL HANG IN THERE UNTIL SHE SIMPLY CAN’T HANG IN THERE ANYMORE.
SHE SAYS THE PAIN IS GETTING WORSE, SHE SAID SHE KNOWS WHAT IS GOING ON INSIDE OF HER, AND THAT SHE IS DYING FROM THE INSIDE OUT, SHE SAYS SHE IS DYING FROM THE INSIDE OUT BUT NOTHING, NOT EVEN THIS CANCER COULD REACH HER FAITH. THAT IT IS THE ONE THING SHE HAS BBEEN ABLE TO HOLD ON TO. MAYBE THAT IS WHAT HURTS THE MOST THAT SHE STILL SEEMS TO HOLD ON TO A GOD WHO IS TAKING HER AWAY FROM ME ONE DAY AT A TIME.