I Need You

It's a strong aching yearn.
The passion you instilled-
It still burns.
I'm weak, sensitive, broken.
It's far too easy to have my heart stolen.
Chewed.
Crushed.
Handed back.
And you can laugh in my face for what I lack.
But that isn't you.
You're better than that.
This is where I failed to dispute the fact,
That I'd let you down,
And force you away.
Then wish you back, the very next day.
And inside it's warm,
Because I think of you.
But the problem is I'm empty too.
And the tears flow two at a time,
from these bloodshot eyes of mine.
Tears not for one but well nigh a score,
Of good friends I've had and pushed out the door.
I'd give them the key, then change the lock.
Turn to the mirror where I bickered and fought,
With myself over my lastest mistake,
Of telling another loved one that I only felt hate.
Call me a liar.
Please, it's not true,
When I say that I don't like you.
I'm on my knees,
Begging you to stay,
Please.
I know sometimes I'm an ass.
And I make my feelings as transparent as glass.
I wish I had the slightest comfort,
From the emotional turmoil I've caused by my blunders.
And I'd ask for a second chance,
But I'm sure I've gotten a few.
So is this the last time I betray you?
My heart sinks when I close the gate.
I thought it was what I wanted.
You were truly my best mate.
I lied, not to you, but to myself.
I thought I was ready,
It's how I felt.
It's impossible to say,
Tomorrow's a better day,
If no one's there to greet the sun,
With me at dawn.
But that's my fault, because when the moon was out,
I'd scream and shout,
until all the stars left me alone.
So here I lay.
Now that everyone has gone away,
I realize what I've done has hit home.
But I'm not writing for me.
It's an apology,
To all the friends I've treated less than properly.
And I just want to say,
I'm sorry for the way I treated you the other day.