Unanswerable Questions

I tried to see the good in life.
I tried to do this without a knife.
I can’t pretend anymore.
My body is bruised, my heart is sore.
I’m tired of being something I hate,
Can you see what a monster I make?
I wish to rip and tear off my mask,
It only reminds me of the horrid past.
This smile plastered on my face is a joke,
I can talk no more, on your words I choke.
Why can’t time heal me, why am I not well?
Why is my pain so easy to tell?
Let me be content, allow me to live.
I have nothing more to be, nothing more to give.
Drained of everything, I drown.
Poisonous words only bring me down.
Let the stars die and evil take their place.
Defeat is written all over my pale face.
Snowy tears fall from the sky.
I stare out my window and watch my life fly by.
In the clouds, they can speak to me.
They say what pain can you not see?
The dagger in my heart will twist and turn,
Every movement only makes it burn.
Light is shown from the dark,
Your life on my heart is a permanent mark.
Why do I always feel as I do?
Why do I continually let you through?
I am not strong enough to fight you back,
Watch me as my heart will break and crack.
Lose myself in your deep thoughts.
Leave me to die as my soul slowly rots.
Watch me bleed as I know you do.
Tell me, why do you always get through?