Game of Pohms (CH1)

Chapter One

I

The rains of March into April,
reminiscent of last year’s NAPO,
sitting in a pickup truck by
swaying bamboo, a gaping hole
in my backyard where the
greenhouse was being built,
a perimeter of shadows.

I found myself pondering the
various machinations, through
which folks communicate.

For example, ostensibly unfollowing
and even blocking you, whilst still
reading you, in order to gain
information on you.

Admittedly, this is kind of a
strange thing to do, but not in
a good way, more a creepy
way,

What would make it even more
creepy would be if this was
their default online interaction
mode.

I do admit my online interaction
mode is…

Probably terrible.

However, I would like to say that
my mode was directly influenced
by their mode.

Like the way metal becomes
magnetized, however, in this case,
sort of like…

Being magnetized by negative
vibes.

II

It’s all rooted in forms of
dark psychology.

Very complex stuff…

I have decided to explore these
themes and ideas in a memoir
of my experience at:

DeepUndergroundPoetry.

I would not have considered
writing a book about these
things…

Now.

I wouldn’t exactly call the group
gaslighting and attacks a betrayal…



I mean…

Let’s say you met someone online,
at a poetry site, and thought they
were an interesting soul, beginning
to chat online, getting to know one
another.

Let’s say they have a tendency
not to communicate but to read all
of your posts, in order to develop
a file of information.

I can understand being curious,
however, imagine they are collecting
information for dark purposes.

Collecting information out of a
narcissistic need to control.

III

Let’s say this person contacts you
out of the blue saying:

My mom is dying and I am an
orphan with no place to live.  Can
I come live with you.

Imagine you said yes, with no thought
of exploitation, only a thought of
helping.

Then they say that they are just
exploring their options.

Then they say things that seem
suspicious and just disappear.

But then you hear they are telling
people to block you.

Then imagine this is a poetry
site.

It may be difficult to write in
such an environment.

IV

I will say that either they didn’t
have to convince people too
much or everyone had the same
idea, however, upon last count,
ten people have blocked me.

Perhaps my writing is that terrible
to them.

I, personally, would never block
a poet.

If I didn’t like them I would still
read the poetry and probably
comment.

It is what might be called: Sad.

I truly think poetry is sacred and have
always been reluctant to call
someone: Poet.

V

Oh yeah…

The file…

Upon getting to know this person,
I quickly saw that they keep files
on folks.

Like to prove their argument
with even strangers.

So I thought to myself, at that
time, don’t tell them anything
you don’t want everyone knowing.

I said some crazy things, here
and there, things that were all
to make them feel better about
themselves.

Things that I can imagine them
changing the context of and
using against me…

VI

Right, that’s the thing.

I contacted them a few weeks
ago, by text.

After having changed my number
and not notifying them.

I felt bad.

Like I abandoned them.

My reasoning went deep.

I opened my heart about stuff like
they were my friend and they
would understand.

They banished me, saying they
can’t talk to me anymore.

Someone I was going to give
a place to stay, who I thought…

I then realized they might not
have known I changed my
number, like I thought when
changing it, because they
never messaged.

It’s totally crazy…

I mean, it plays on my conceptualizations
of art.

Which involves heart and soul.

VII

It goes way deep…

But yes, I think it speaks to an
overarching narrative on modern
digital culture.

I also recently went back on
a sex site.

I was on one, briefly, in my
twenties.

I wanted to write a book, based
on that.

Now, I see the narrative or theme,
growing in scope, from internet
1.0 to internet 2.0.

I plan to explore all of this in the
memoir, which I am going to post
on the poetry website I am building.

It is going to be a membership site
with a total pay block.

A “Red Velvet Rope”, for the whole
site.

The monthly fee includes unlimited
storage space, a monthly newsletter,
games & prizes, poetry merch and
much more..!

For 10 bucks a month.

Less then the price of 20  sack.

Also…

Members shall sign a contract
with self to:

Write every day.

(It is both, terrifying and exciting
at the same time…)

Let there be a literary renaissance..!

(Also, the fact that this person
could be reading this is…

Thought provoking.)

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NAPO
.ALT
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