beseech

 
darkness wanders and I am away
drifting into the void
listless silence and spirits with plenty to say
singing salutations, to my flickering soul
a beacon to those searching

rising on the air I avoid treachery
gentle of thought even the worst of these deserve attention
mingling with the elements we communicate
the ghosts and my mortality

my answers unclear
because they leave me with more questions
and I am beside myself
with explanations that are temporary

escaping the restless I rise higher
and deeper into the dark
seeking answers for the questions that plague

dreaming things into being
reaching for fragments of memory
I sew them together
and piece by piece answers are revealed
some hard to accept

resist the doubt, I search the shadowy depths
with great care, I uncover parts of me I don't get
growing with knowledge, I enter the Kingdom

leaning on my own thoughts, I am sometimes disappointed
recognizing this is a part of being
I can't reject the honesty of the moment

pain is a part of living
it's up to me how I deal with it
clinging to beliefs, that helped me when I was a child
will do no good here
wisdom is demanded of me

succumbing to madness
I have in days passed rebelled
not liking what I have seen
but it has formed an opinion in me
a moral guide within
my solace, I've done my best

richly rewarded when I chose wisely
rebuff when I am foolish
tender understanding, for who I am

returning to the garden
I walk with the Father in the shade
and we discuss what is pressing on me
His affection for me, evident

I ask him to forgive me
for the days I made him bitterly jealous
a more painful feeling there isn't