Big small, world.

There are roughly 3 million people in Texas.
That's 3,000,000.
I am the only one who is me.
It's hard to feel special in the face of those kinds of oddly simple numbers as I had pointed out to someone.
When you see 3,000,000 you don't think of anything other then what you read.
Still for some reason I feel very...
Loved, unique and valuable.
Like.
I am right where I need to be.
Right where my purpose is.
God has set me right here.
Even though there are countless other unique lives and personalities and interests, I feel at home in this big small world.
Yet this feeling goes deeper.
I also feel like I have just scratched the surface of this land.
I feel a sense of awe looking around.
This is where I was ment to be in this moment.

I am...
Right where I belong.
But there is something else here...
A longing.
An emptiness-
Like this is not really my home.
I wait for the glory of heaven and yet I feel comforted where I rest.
This place called earth, though to me and to some a living hell,
Is oddly just enough to get by.
The void of loss and pain that I am ever aware of is chained up in the duality of rest and longing.
Insult and respect of the deeper things in life.
Yes I am but a small number in the face of such unfathomable plans the great powers have.
But even so.
I am very much like a stone in a mosaic.
Take it out and everything seems off without a clear reason why.
I am the Lords puzzle piece.
And I feel in place.
Awaiting a future where He paints me perfect and the picture is white and gold infinities.