free falling

 
in between the lines of my poetry
my tears flow free
and my binds don't hurt as much
I pull on them less
my anxiety doesn't go but it's not as bad

so I write incessantly
fluent in anguish
I speak torture real well
sadness doesn't talk
she sighs and whispers and aches

the problem is I've tried everything
if I try to silence them they go deep down
that's when the burning begins
a smoldering, festering pyre
rage besets me and I leave sense behind
there is no ridding myself of this

since childhood I have not interacted well with people
I'm kind and gentle
it gets me taken advantage of
then they get to meet the dark me
it seems like they never knew I had a hard side
it always catches them off guard
I guess I'm too dark

so I meditate letting myself astral travel
my eyes see trails of stardust
little wisps of gold
leading me to leave my body behind
my soul rises and I can fly

I wonder will I make back this time
it's the music I hear
it beckons me to the heavenly plains
while I slowly make the trip I dream

my origins unknown I continue my search
will I recognize home when I see it
I seek my Father
his name is wisdom
it's been sometime since I've heard his voice
I climb higher in the atmosphere
my imagination both a blessing and a curse