May 18, 2024 8:30 am

uu don’t tell people "i’m not okay" because it’s hard watchin them not know what to do
then "uu" end up comforting "them" even though the one who needed comfortin was "uu"
see all ii ever wanted was a big, warm, cozy, very long hug
but every time ii tried to open up, all ii ever got was a mean mug n a deep shrug
a cold shoulder felt like a big boulder on my back, weighin me down
ii looked into their eyes and each and every one of them let me drown
water filled my lungs as ii sunk deeper and deeper
ii tried to reach out for a hand but neither one of them was a keeper
ii DROWNED
it was time to go home but ii didn’t wanna go, ii didn’t wanna become a ghost
eventually ii just gave up and let my demons take over and co-host
ii rose up and became what everyone fears the most
a soulless bein who only cared 4 himself
nothing even mattered because only ii would sit on the TOP shelf
wasn’t there anyone anywhere who could free my mind and be my PEACE
ii never wanted to KILL ii never wanted to reap
reap the souls of my opps like the grim reaper
ik if ii keep this up imma end up as his doorkeeper
lonely days turned into lonely nights, lonely nights turned into sleepless nights, sleepless nights turned into school fights and school fights turned into gettin fried, goin outside, livin life on cloud 9 without a care in mind
it went from drugs to money to guns to bodies…bodies…bodies and more bodies…
our side their side their side and their side…
…bodies…
ii couldn’t open up abt a lot of things as ii grew up because they wouldn’t understand
that my smile was fake and my laughs were short
that ii needed help and ii could’ve really used their support
no one cared abt julian and they always wondered y ii couldn’t quit those drugs
but like ii said before all ii ever wanted was a big, warm, cozy, very long hug !!