deepundergroundpoetry.com

Goodnight: Meaning Farewell

You�ll never actually understand.

These aren�t just words,

They�re my life.

My.

Myself.

I hate myself.

I hate myself...

I hate my voice,
I hate my smile,
I hate my skin,
And I hate what�s underneath it.

My blood feels less red than other people�s,
My insides feel softer.

I don�t want to die because I don�t feel worthy of the mourning.

I feel like a bad person,
I never know what to say and what people will say back.

I�d hate to die,
Because I�d never get to see my corpse.

Sometimes I hope someone else kills me,

And they make it hurt.

I�m ashamed of these thoughts.

I hate that I�m human,
That I deserve things.

I wish I could just never speak to you again,

I hate that I made you miss me.

I hate that I miss you too.

I hate that I�m jealous,
And I hate that I�m here.

Here�

I�m never really here,

Am I?

Am I?

Bury every limb separate from each other,
Dissect the host and rip me just above the seams.

I never want to speak to you again,

Selfish is that thought.

Of leaving you.

I hope you aren�t mad.

You told me you would be.

I�m not mad.

I don�t have enough blood in my body to be mad anymore.

Goodbye,

Said the boy.

Goodnight,

Said the girl.

So close to what was said,

The silence in the morning will be staggering.

You�ll live.