Late night healing

Healing is also realizing how badly you have been hurt , and holding each stage of yourself so tenderly.  The tenderness of a mother , I never knew till I was old enough to heal . Even when surrounded by family I was alone as a child. I was spoiled with toys , yet starving emotionally . A sleeping father and an absent mother, praying on my knees to please make me pure again , to please still love me , to a God long silent.  My story is mine , and mine alone. Just because someone remembers differently does not negate my truth .Sure, there were moments of tender  , however I was still largely alone . A little girl silently screaming , how blessed I am to be able to create, to finally give  a voice to her .I see my inner child 5 maybe , screaming, silent to all around but I hear her . The pain in her tiny little voice is palatable .She has adorable little braided pigtails , and tears  pouring down her face. It's not dwelling on the past , if you were never allowed to feel it, when it was present  .